coffeedrinkingwoman

Firefly Quote

2005-05-25T23:28:00.000-07:00

Season 1...Eppie 1

Zoe: Oh, yeah, this is gonna go great.
Mal: If anyone gets nosy, just, you know-shoot them.
Zoe: Shoot'em?
Mal: Politely...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Cultural pop background notes...I think this definately has it's source in Han Solo advising Chewy to " fly casual" into the Death Star. In fact, Mal has definately cultural son vibes to Han Solo.

For May 24

2005-05-23T23:45:00.000-07:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BOB DYLAN !!

2005-05-23T23:33:00.000-07:00

I am going to do some experimenting and such on this blog, so consider it "under construction" for at least a month or so, then may or may not be continued.

GRSitesneeeds to get the credit for the background.

If you're interested , I do have a LJ...Normaltrouble
If you stop by and have come from here, please comment on one my latest posts at my Livejournal, which is currently under the name of "not on the rug"...

Chapter 8

2005-04-18T15:07:00.000-07:00

Well, I am behind on the whole Cheryl Richardson thing, and haven't done anything here at all. I am going to try to resurrect this whole life makeover stuff.
Daily check ins. Maybe very short, but they'll be there.
Chapter 8 title...
" What's Fueling You?"
there. tomorrow, I'll explore it more.

Quote from her on her site..." Awareness is the first step towards change."

Creativity exercises

2005-04-09T05:05:00.000-07:00

I am going to do some very simple ones at first...here are the links where I found Decalogue prompts...

" List 10 places where..."
1. The first place I remember is my livingroom.
2. The best place in town to study is a couple of different coffee shops or cafes in town.
3. I'd like to go back to is Italy.
4. I gather thoughts together and feel like a human being again is the shower.
5. I feel best are these 5 places....
listening to a good lecture and learning something...drinking a perfect cup of coffee, and observing people, reading, and enjoying a good talk, being in a theatre and enjoying a great movie with the atmosphere of a movie theatre all around me...walking around and seeing interesting urban landscapes ...
there, a decalogue of sorts.
A small beginning, but I've not done this sort of thing in a very long time.

I am back !!

2005-04-09T04:45:00.000-07:00

My life is sort of a self made shambles, so I decided I need some Cheryl Richardson help!! I cannot say I will come by here and post in any regular way, so I randomly chose a chapter by flipping to a page...as good a method as any.
Since I also desperately need some creativity in my life, I'll probably drone on for a moment or two after this post, in a seperate post, something creative.
Week 18 is called Focus Your Energy.
It covers the simple act of laying out the 3 priorities for the week...every morning, in a journal. It also covers putting beneath each priority 3 actions to make sure this actually gets done.
Easy for me to figure out...I have 3 priorities this coming week looking right at me...
1. I have an exam Monday ...
a. set aside 2 hours each day til Monday to go over the basics
b. get plenty of sleep and rest and good food , so my mind will be as sharp as possible
c. relax about it
2. I have a paper due Wednesday
a. set aside 2 hours each day to prepare and brainstorm
b. Monday concentrate on finishing actual paper
c. Tuesday go into college and type it out, print it out and...uh, relax.
3. Scheduling
a. use my little academic calendar wherever I go
b. Call certain people up and confirm various appts, make appts, write them down.
c. Check on this daily and take it seriously.
There, that covers 2 areas of my life that need a little TLC...my college life, and my organisational stuff.

Chapter 7 in the book

2005-02-22T01:18:00.000-08:00

...is all about Grace.
No big assignment, just open yourself up to taking the best care of your self, your life, and the synchronicity of the universe to help you in that goal...

~~~ Also, please think twice before you go click the " next blog" button. One of the " next blogs" might actually give you spyware.~~~

Poetry

2005-02-18T00:16:00.000-08:00

This is a poem from titles of books, and some inspirations the titles give me ...the titles are split, and used to spur 1-3 sentences in the poem...
=================================================================

Sky
bluegrey tones washed with white
Coyote
eyes shining across asphalt
wild dryness of fear's mouth
Dawn
aching bones, new bones, old muscles
again and again and again, the sun goes
on and on
The burning
slash, across my life, across earth
ash feeding the soil
Stone
used the core, using the flakes,
intentions
Gods
not one complete
Circus
bright, up, and down
hearing the faint thoughts of angels
of the Damned
no one is damned, not one
hell contains no flames
nothing
Time
this is the element I can barely manage
I let it push me around too much
Past
it's good to look backward, but
Strong
steel, iron, red, dark, grey, ocean
as Death
I agree with Kenneth Patchen
I don't like Mr. Death
Gaudy
bright, wild, violet clouds
orange sky
Night
enveloping, surrounding,
velvet, promise of seduction
Suffer
thin screeching sound in the blackness
Little
dust
Children
flying through the air, with stars,
Chagall like
Impossible
peace,
some say
Things
on my bed, books, cards, address book
academic calendar, lotions, gels
sheets,quilt,nightrobe

Poetry

2005-02-10T14:41:00.000-08:00

This is an exercise from The Practice of Poetry: Writing Exercises from Poets Who Teach/by / Robin Behn & Chase Twitchell

Intelligence Test / Alberta Turner
poem based on this exercise...

=======================================

Catching crows on my geographic tongue
Stand in the shower, wash my hair til it rains
Inflating,tossing,bouncing a balloon in the shape of
Making it telling the truth, the hen, Faked an egg...
I played with an ax, casually, I had a basket and carried
water from the rain, truth from an egg,
I had the egg with a side of marginalia,
I breathed your miasma for the last time,
I shrunk to the size of a pea and hid under your bed, inside a leaf
I pretended the tail wasn't mine.

6th Chapter

2005-02-10T14:33:00.000-08:00

I may need to work on this for a while, heh...
" What's Draining you?"
is the chapter...
yikes.

I can honestly say the first thing draining me is my weird sleeping/eating scheduling, and that what is encouraging is ...I learnt it takes 6 months to establish a habit. I'd always heard it took 3 weeks. I think the 3 weeks is to just lay a foundation for building a habit, and that the habit isn't " settled" into the system for about 6 months...so I hope to get on a better scheduling in the next 3 weeks, and I hope to establish a habit of it by say---July, which isn't that bad or aweful a thing...
I also think I haven't done much with my writing , creatively speaking, and I need to re-introduce that into this blog. It might take a few weeks to re-schedule my brain to include a few paragraphs of basic writing, or a poem or two...
But I do feel a definate lack of the creative in my life. So, if you come by here at all, look forward to a poem or a paragraph or three, hopefully everytime I show up!!
It might however, be in a different post than my Cheryl Richardson book postings...
Uh, follow up on stuff :
Self care- doing at about level 4 lately...level 10 being like superb, level 1 being pretty damn poor
College-- level 6 1/2
Apt cleaning-- level 1...really, honestly, frankly...
Contacting people-- level 3
AM morning written journal-- level 1

Sooo...I am definately going to try and do something creative everytime I poke my head into this blog.

Yes List

2005-02-07T21:08:00.000-08:00

This is my Yes list , stuff that I'd like follow up on every week through around 4/2/05 and of course, beyond...
1. Yes to self care : especially 3 balanced meals a day everyday, and walking everyday.

2. Yes to studying 2 hours per unit per class a week.

3. Yes to cleaning and clearing out my apartment.

4. Yes to connecting and contacting people I know.

5. Yes to paying attention to time management.

4th and 5th week of the book

2005-02-03T19:06:00.000-08:00

Cheryl Richardson's books influences are wide ranging! Chapter 4 uses Julia Cameron's the Artist's Way ( I tried it a few times...but...I found it too intricate to follow...I need to learn to step by step progress, in little bites, and Ms. Richardson's slooooow approach, non-judgemental attitude suits me to a " T "...)
which is covered in encouraging people to do the morning pages journal. Basically it's 3 pages of free form whatever the hellyawant writing, always just after you wake up.
Uh, I did 4 days out of 6 so far. Oh well...I am learning maintenance and consistancy, and certainly won't be perfect this year heh.

The next chapter is all about time.
She challenges in the book to take action and make an absolute Yes list when it comes to spending your time. I will probably not list the list here...it will probably be thought over the next few morning pages , but she mentions that to find out my Absolute yes list ( 5 priorities to say yes to in the next 3 months...) , I might think about these as criteria :
1. Your self care is always a valid excuse.
2. You don't need to overexplain or defend your actions. Just tell the simple truth.
3. Doing things out of guilt and obligation is not doing things out of love.

Finally beyond chapter 2...

2005-01-26T03:47:00.000-08:00

Chapter 2 of Cheryl Richardson's book challenged me to list 3 actions to help me " live life to the fullest"...
and the Chapter 3 theme, challenge , action , quote is ...
Finding your Lost Self
When you're in solitary confinement and you're six feet under without light, sound, or running water, there is no place to go but inside. And when you go inside, you discover that everything that exists in the Universe is also within you.

Theme : Rediscovering your self.
Some things she lists as possible ways to aid in rediscovering myself...
Journaling, capture my dreams, Creating a community of support, rewaken my spiritual life. Scheduling time for myself, by myself is her challenge for me this week.

2005-01-20T21:13:00.000-08:00

Sooooo back to my blog's usual...I have more political stuff at mutteringsmalltalk, if you're interested.

Per Cheryl Richardson's 2nd chapter, I was to find a general theme, goal for life this year...and I am just picking the one I had from last year..." Living life to the fullest"...
I think to live life to the fullest, I have to be the healthiest "me" I can possibly be. This means that selfcare is first and foremost on my list. Soooo...my first priority this year is any action that is positive for my health- be it mental, physical, emotional and / or spiritual.
The first selfcare tactic I am going to attempt to " act upon" is a more balanced time schedule. Which means standard time to wake up and get going, get breakfast, and do my general errands and take care of my life, etc. Sounds pretty basic---but I allow my scheduling to go ping ponging everywhere, and it does not serve me as well as taking care of my self in a more balanced way by having 3 meals a day, getting up in time to take care of things and having energy to do so because of apprpriate sleeping habits etc.
That's it for now. I am taking this very slowly, and as I said, may take 2 weeks on one chapter, 2 chapters for 1 week etc.

2005-01-19T21:45:00.000-08:00

I am blacking out this blog in protest of Mr. Bush's Inaugral and his policies.

2005-01-16T23:24:00.000-08:00

Chapter 2, " week 2 "..focus is New Year/New You...
The quote is :
The world rewards those who take responsibility for their own success.

It talks about setting internal goals, and as I read the last year's goal...well, seem like a decent one to me...
" I am going to live life to the fullest."

Probably has some different meaning than last year, and possibly a few different intentions of actions I can take to help fulfill that goal. But I want to claim that goal again.
The actions I choose to make sure this has a decent chance of happening will be a little different. I am going to need to think about that. Hopefully I'll be back sometime tomorrow.

2005-01-14T21:21:00.000-08:00

I think I am a human animal with many different aspects- and one that interests me is political.
I have used the Political Compass a few times, and this time around my figures are :
economic left/right= - 7.50
social libertarian/authoritarian = -5.69

It's an interesting site and gives an interesting analysis of your political position, which is probably, like most people's way beyond a " party line", more closely a mix and match of personal views on various issues...

I'll probably do some political exploring , due to this being a politically charged week in the US. I'll go back to self improvement and self help sometime after the election.

2005-01-11T23:55:00.000-08:00

Here are some links that might be of use or helpful to you if you come upon this blog...Spirituality and Health
There is a really good test there as to what you might want to work on in your spiritual path. I recieved as the main element in my life to work on " Transformation"... after that, "love" and "you"...

Belief Net...whatever you believe, they have information, meditations, news etc. It's an interesting site, whether you stand firm in a particular religion or are exploring.

Coffee Information...overview of basics, also includes news concerning coffee related items. Add to your knowledge about my favorite cuppa, and maybe yours, too.

Looking forward and backward...

2005-01-11T23:10:00.000-08:00

As i leave the last semester's discoveries behind, I am taking 3 classes...Physical Anthropology. Prehistory&Archaeology, and a computer course.
I am excited about the possiblities !! I think I'll accomplish at the very least the following from the classes :
1. Improving my GPA...my contract with myself is an " A " in each course.
2. Widening my feild of knowledge of both anthropology and computers.
3. Figuring out if I can take 2 classes in a row ( they're right after each other, fortunately just 5 minutes away...) ...work...and deal with my life at the same time.
4. Do I want to continue with Anthroplogy as a feild of endeavor?
5. I will reap some physical exercise benefits from this...3 days a week, I'll be walking to/from bus or shuttle, at least 15 minutes each morning, including time walking to class from bus, and walking up and down stairs 3 times also. It will add to some well needed time moving my body !!
6. I may gain some social outlet, maybe find a freind or two, although this is not my primary or secondary concern.

As to this blog, yes, this may just become a weekly " progress report " blog. I think this may work just fine this way !! I'd love to be able to dedicate a little more time to it, but with college work probably taking about 24 hours a week, and with future job hours ideal at 20-25 hours a week, this allows for little time for a consistant self help blog for every single day of the week.

However, because of my messy little hovel, I cannot find my Cheryl Richardson book, so sometime this coming week, I'll post the next chapter's focus and attept to complete that.
I'd love to always include a good selfhelp site or whatever everytime I check in, so if people wander through here, they can go somewhere and explore the road less taken, which is in my mind, an examined life, an explored faith, and an expanding mind. I'll attempt to find 3 good sites tonight for all 3 roads I just mentioned.

Accomplishments for the past year...

2005-01-02T20:54:00.000-08:00

I am per, Cheryl Richardson's book, reviewing my accomplishments for the past year.
Here are five other more tangible accomplishments...
1. I learnt some more about the 'net and my computer.
2. I decided to go back to college.
3. I took 3 courses at college,passed 2. I didn't give up after I sort of crashed and burned with my Spanish class.
4. I got an 89 on my final in Cultural Anthropology and a B in the class.
5. I am eating better, and have a more balanced diet.

Wow New Year New Focus !!

2004-12-31T16:15:00.000-08:00

I am going to focus on something new for this blog.
I'll be focusing on this book : Life Makeovers by Cheryl Richardson
I may spread one chapter over 2 weeks, or do 2 chapters in a week, but I am going to finish the book by well...the last week of next year.
I may only list her quote for the week for an entry...maybe a whole long rant or rave about the subject, or maybe what I am going to do to "take action" for her " assignment" for the week.
But unless I have an extra hustle bustle day...or am ill...I'll try to make this a 7 day a week blog. I do have 9 units ( quite a commitment for me...yikes! ) at college, so if this is interfering with my progress there, I will probably change it to 5 days a week.
Soooo...this is my selfcare, self improvement blog. Mostly fairly boring stuff, might be slightly inspiring maybe 10% of the time, but it's all about getting my life more organised, more fulfilling, and well...taking care of myself.

I also commit to the following :
1. Working on developinmg on good habit every 6 weeks.
I've chosen my cleaning/clearing of the apartment I live in. I may or may not go on about this here...
2. Development of one healthy physical " habit" every 6 weeks.
My first goal is exercise. I plan on going very slow, but I am fairly sedentary, and hope to get my toosches off the couch for a little extra movement...everyday.

So, I am giving my weight here : 195 pounds.
I won't weight myself til Feb 15. My main goal will be to eat for energy and fitness so I feel like doing a walk everyday, and if I can afford it, to join a gym Feb 1.

First Life Makeover week is :
" Love yourself first and everything else falls into line."
Lucille Ball
This is an overview chapter of the accomplishments of last year.
It has as a take action challenge to list important accomplishments for the past year...I may adjust the take action challenge from time to time...
* Qualities of character I have strengthened :
1. Compassion
2. Listening
3. Faith
4. Endurance
5. Being a good freind

Long time no post !!

2004-12-03T01:35:00.000-08:00

I am on a break from this blog.
Best case scenario, I start doing writing exercises again sometime around Dec 20.
Worst case scenario...I'll decide about that sometime after the first of the year !!
Normaltrouble
is somewhere I update at least 5 days a week !! Come on by, comment, freind me...hope to see you there.

Poetry exercise

2004-10-27T20:44:00.000-07:00

I am back...actually writing again.
Probably hopefully every Friday or Saturday, I'll do a writing exercise. My writing muscle is very atrophied of late...I know I'll need to find a good 15 minutes a day to do any good at all, but I am cutting down my internet usage in half til just after the election, then for about 3 weeks, to almost nothing...

This exercise I am adapting from Practice of Poetry by Twitchell & Behn, exercise suggested by J.D. McClatchy

Ran off my window...
night.
falling, the wind and rain don't stop.
The moon cuts into my bedroom.
Its noise the silence of breathing.
Moonlight, midnight, dawn, noon, dusk come and go.
Pale and bright and cloudy and wild and cold.
Curtains drawn, blinds closed, I am sheltered,
The sun and moon and rain and wind and trees and birds sing ,
companions enough with a book and some tea.

( from " answering lines" to Charlotte Bronte's "The Autumn Day Its Course has Run" )

Next update : 10/29-30

2004-10-09T22:53:00.000-07:00

Credit goes to iconbelieveit for my new background.

Character sketch

2004-10-07T19:47:00.000-07:00

She was facing 50. She wasn't sure if 50 was breathing down her neck in a black robe, carrying a scythe, or if it was dancing at the periphery of her vision, half wild coyote woman, half ragged fool , trying not to fall of a cliff. Yes, 50 was...not right next door. But it was a few doors down, close enough to borrow some of her sugar.
Facing 50 and 2 men. 2 men that made her look in the mirror, and count the frown lines above dark grey blue eyes, counting smile lines around lips, and very carefully trying to gauge the weight loss as shown in the cheekbones slowly emerging from the fat of her indulgent decade, her 30's, her flush years of loneliness and too many hot fudge sundaes.
These 2 men might see 2 different women, she mused, as she fiddled with her newly dyed hair. Her hair helped hide a few of her mid 40ish years. Much of her forties had been full of total dullard redundancy. Goddess, the early 40's had been such a routine repetitive act that she felt sometime around her 41st birthday and her 45th, she had fallen asleep.
When did she wake up?
Was it the time she entered her painting at a local show and won 2nd prize, and had sold it for as much as she earned in a month from her aweful dead end job ? She had met Arturo. Poetic, rambling, almost prosperous Arturo. He designed anything he could for anybody for a good amount of money--- livingrooms, landscaping, websites...and yet his own life was this rambling shambling slouching towards total disaster and messiness,neatness and well planned acheivements- his bathroom and kitchen were immaculate, his bedroom was cluttered, his living room had his work scattered all over the place...not much living was done that wasn't something eaten or music listened to, he was either at a cafe, working or going to a concert or gallery. And of course, she had been in the middle of an illicit affair with her one of her bosses, who was almost seperated from his wife, an affair that was causing her to ignore Arturo's interest in her. Besides, Arturo mostly lived in New York City, and she disliked the idea of a long distance roman ce of any sort.
She imagined he saw the contrast, small frame with large hips, running towards fat except for slender arms and small hands. The rather pedestrian taste in clothes and a certain elegance in jewalry and always a different purse or handbag or backpack or messenger bag...Being such a visual person, he probably saw her eyes behind her glasses, and her pale golden skin.
She had bumped into Arturo the week after she had quit...just before her 46th birthday, and he had softly announced he had moved to Helensberg fulltime. She was a free woman, and in fact, much like the Joni Mitchell song, she had even been in Paris for a short while. No affair ( stopped that in its tracks before Christmas of her 45th year...)no dull dead end job...she must have looked different somehow, because he actually asked her to go out for coffee.
Arturo had been the last person she had ever expected to find interested in her. Not that they had ever gone past long talks over coffee. Arturo had invested in the small town he had previously only visited for summers and an occasional " get away from it all" He was part new owner of the Media Outlet , a book/dvd/"media" store in between Cafe Jasmine and Moore's General Store. He made sure the erstwhile homely store had window displays worthy of New York City in his store.
Then there was her new neighbor. Helensberg had just built her first tract since 1995 and they were deluxe luxury homes with a Tuscan vinyard feel and 1 acre yards each. They were across from her, and had used to be an orchard...now were 12 homes over 3 blocks. Across from her, on 510 Moore Ave, was since early spring ,none other than the home of writer Vic Northen. Vic had had a stellar career in his 20's as a literary and critical success, had gone Hollywood in his 30's and had disappeared to " parts unknown" somewhere around his 42nd birthday, after divorcing starlette Audrey Wolsteder on her own 30th birthday after 7 star studded years of coke, premieres,blockbusters,near Oscar nominations and golden starlight...
He had a spare,slender,loose look to him. He had a slight paunch about his stomach, the only area where fat was allowed, she supposed. . He had ash brown hair with a few grey hairs. She had watched him move in ... he hardly had anything but the necessities. In her time in Helensberg, she had turned into a small town woman, and had brought over lasagna and brownies.
His own conversation had been so basic. Yes, moved here to be somewhere quiet. Yes, I have just sold my first screenplay in about 8 years. I'd like to see some of your paintings. She had answered him as basically as she could also...yes, my name is Marie Deberg. The cottage has been in the family for over 100 years.I've lived here for 16 years, in this cottage for 11.I just left my job of 10 years and am making some money from paintings now.
The mirror showed her what she saw, and what she knew of herself, and she smiled. She saw the 20 pounds she had lost, the woman who had said no after a few weeks of an adulterous affair just a few years ago, she saw someone who sometimes looked 50, sometime felt 80 and most of the times seemed more like 40...she knew herself to be a little tired, a little worried, lonely, and very excited and proud of her latest paintings... Did Vic see her in terms of a Hollywoodesque character? Short woman, mid to late 40's, looking younger than her age, wearing casual clothes with a slight flare for a bohemian edge,with wildly dyed dark burgundy hair. Middle class background, slightly diminished in financial circumstances, pleasant to look at but not beautiful.
The first gallery showing of her works was in an hour. She nervously drank some water. She had a few hopes...and questions...would Arturo ever be more than a casual coffee talk partner, and would she ever get to know her neighbor,Vic beyond her own subjective observations from a few sentences? Most importantly, would she sell more than three out of the 15 paintings? That's all she had sold in the past few months, and she was nervous. Nervous about having to look for a " real" job, nervous about her outfit a short sleeved vintage 50's she hoped wasn't too " Lucy Ricardo" or plain. Nervous that her price for the paintings ,after all, she had only sold a few dozen over the past 10 years, was too high..nervous that she had cut off her small town affair with her accountant boss too short,too quick, nervous that his wife might show up, nervous about what Arturo might think about her latest work, and nervous that he might think nothing ! Did she yearn for a complex man like Arturo, or someone quiet, soft, simple like Vic? Did she want to get rid of all her cluttery stuff and nesting materials , open up to another person? She laughed. Arturo's complexity was all out there, for display...Vic was probably more complicated than Arturo would even dream of being, just by virtue of being mysterious and so cloaked.
She frowned. She changed from her big purple hat to her one vintage one- palest grey with faux fur of palest lavender. She put a little extra moisturiser over her frown lines. She walked out the door.
The sky was golden and orange and blue and reminded her of one of her paintings.

~~~~~~ ~~~~~~ ~~~~~~ ~~~~~~ ~~~~~~ ~~~~~~ ~~~~~~ ~~~~~ ~~~~~~
***All writing is property of Normaltrouble ***
*** Do not use without permission of author ***
*** All characters fictional ***

Weekly blog

2004-09-27T18:47:00.000-07:00

I am going to attempt to make it here every Friday.
I am lessening my net-time, and it's because of my college study needs.

I can also be found here :
Chaosinorder
Every Saturday, I have a column there. The Spider Whispers Mountains to the Coffee.

Kaplaghfinewhatever's Musings
I have a live journal. I'll be updating this more often.

and of course my other blogspot.com blog, which will also be updated Fridays.

if you do come by any of those places, please feel free to comment. Thanks !!

Miercoles

2004-09-15T20:57:00.000-07:00

Spanish Section :
Vocabulario

Imperfecto
===========
muchas veces - many times, often
todos las dias
cada verano - each, every...summer, fall etc.
con frecuencia
siempre/generalmente
mientras- while

Preterito
===========
una vez - once, one time
ayer
el verano pasado
anoche
hace diez años
de repente - suddenly
por fin - finally

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I got a no credit on a workbook section in Spanish...eeep.
I almost walked out of the class, but decided not to quit. I decided to move on past this big block, and go on ...however, I really need to finetune my time management, and so I am going on hiatus from the Internet from 9/18-10/8, around 3 weeks. I am still going to do my Saturday column, " The Spider Whispers Mountains to the Coffee" for Chaosinorderdotcom, and I may do my blogs/lj on Fridays as well. But other than that, any nettage will be minimal, if at all !! I spend a little too much time on the 'net half of the time I am on, so I'm going to try and cut the habit in half, and hopefully will develop some decent study habits in the next 3 weeks !!
How I deal with the Internet after my hiatus will be determined by my use of Fridays, and my grades and how I progress in Spanish. I won't give it up-- it's innformative, fun, and quite frankly, a 21st century skill that seems pretty basic to this contemporary world we live in...
I won't project much further than that down the road, because living in the moment is something I am personally attempting to learn how to do.

Reaction/Progress Report

2004-09-13T01:08:00.000-07:00

Reaction about last week...
Phew.
F ...I got an F = I had and am having a big crisis in how I feel about how I study, when I study, where I study... everything about my study habits. Pretty much I am, about 40 % of the time an angsty mess.
I went out and got a video from the Reentry Office all about test anxiety.
I am sure of one thing. My time management sucks. I keep acting like this whole college thing is something to squuuuuueeze in after rest, sleep, entertainment, trying to figure myself out, personal life ...etc... this was my decision to go. Nobody not external force said geee... let's make her go to college and update her skills and maybe go and find something that will allow me to enjoy going some place to work again ? or probably for the first time ?
That's why the time management issue seems crucial, how to build some skills to allow me to manage my studying hours more intelligently !!

Progress Report

The time was ...when where I'd get an F and just hide. I'd just hide myself away,escaping and then dropping away from everything to do with college. But I don't want to do that anymore.I want to move foreward in my life, yes, I know it's gonna be hard, but I want to develop some skills to replace the bad habits I've used to dysfunctionally cope because I didn't know any better.

Spanish study hint of my very own for the day : Watch something in Spanish. If it's not from a Spanish speaking country...okay, I'd suggest watching Angel in English, Angel in Spanish w/ subtitles and Angel in Spanish without subtitles as well. I am doing this with Season 4. Do not do this with Firefly. Even with my limited Spanish... their translations were just weird.

Español

2004-09-08T22:16:00.000-07:00

I got an "F " on my first exam.
I did well on cultural questions...which was in a true/false format & definitions.
The rest I kinda well...sucked.
Little details caught me up on about 10% of my errors , and verbs counted for about 40%. I hope to get a good solid "C " next exam, and continue to approve to a good solid "B" ...
I hope to include a small study portion to this blog.
I need a good review of verbs, and so I am going to write the basic imperfect forms of verbs here. This doesn't in any way constitute as part of my commitment to studying around 1 1/2 to 3 hours 5-6 days a week. I am giving myself flexibility due the fact that life sometimes serves up stuff to be flexible about !!

Imperfecto de comprar = comprar = to buy, the purchase
( yo ) compraba
( tú ) comprabas
(él , ella, ustd.) compraba
( nos.) comprabábamos
(ellos,ellas,ustds.) compraban

entender = to understand
entendía
entendías
entendía
endtendíamos
entendian

salir = to go out, to leave
salía
salías
salía
salíamos
salían

Changing

2004-09-06T14:48:00.000-07:00

I am changing my blog a little ...
I am organising it per the days of the week. I find I need some structure and organisation in able to focus on this blog's purpose and show up everyday that I possibly can.
This blog will primarily be about focusing on my schoolwork for now.

Sundays will be :
=======
Progress report : Well, so far so good. Haven't missed a class. However, I am wayyyy behind on lab. If I am to catch up, I should go to lab 3 hours the next 3 weeks and then I can relax.

Mondays will be :
========
Vocabulary : 10 words that I have some problems with. I might expand to using them in a sentence.
This week's :
La comoda = bureau ( i.e. dresser in a bedroom )
El cuadro = painting
El suelo = floor
El lavabo = bathroom sink
El fregadero = kitchen sink
el hogar = home
guardar= to keep
apagar= to turn off
aspiradora = vacuum

Tuesdays will be :
========
Grammar

Wednesdays will be :
==========
Spanish notes

Thursdays will be :
=========
Anthropology notes

Fridays will be :
=======
Reactions to this week, a paragraph on how I feel about college etc.

Saturdays will be :
=========
Relaxation day...maybe even some sort of self help program or something like that, a personal day...

Exams, websites...backpack vs 2

2004-09-02T13:32:00.000-07:00

Blogsmexico...another great source for reading Spanish !!

I took my first exam...yikes. I will consider myself amazed if I get above 60% ...

Backpack . My backpack was averaging about 10-13 pounds. Bad. My back was beginning to have unhappy thoughts. So I got a thinner notebook, took some stuff out and jettisoned everything I didn't need.
I now have a backpack at about 7 pounds !!
This whole back to college stuff is getting me quite organised.
Amazing.

I am going to be watching the last half of " A Passage to India " tonight for Cultural Anthropology. This is a great film !!That's what is great about my class... we are watching DVD's as homework...from Pygmalion to Mr Baseball to 2 Star Trek episodes ( Who Watches the Watchers?, and Darmok )...etc.

Interesting Quiz...Making college work for me...

2004-08-30T13:56:00.000-07:00

There's a geography quiz that Loner at the Soapbox ( WWDN's internet community ) linked to.
Very good quiz, Lizardpoint's Geoquiz ...
My best scores were for the World and Central America...worst score was for the Caribbean.

I am starving.
Going to go off and eat, then more studying Spanish : I'll do the lab , which I am resisting so much I think I'll give myself a reward everytime I go in there. I got a tutor, and this is already helping just after 1 visit !! Yay. I have to finish the workbook, which I also semi-avoid... guess a reward for finishing it will be in order, also. I may " spoil" myself this semester, but it's all in the name of getting good study habits.
I am also going to get a very small shoulder purse for wallet & keys etc, so I don't have to keep swinging my heft backpack everytime I pay to get on the bus etc... and another bookbag of some sort for the days ( Fridays mostly) when I carry my 2 binders, 2 books...etc...because my right shoulder is kinda tweaking out, and my back is definately not happy !! I am getting stronger-but , and losing some weight as a result of walking around campus etc. however...I need to balance out my weight of my backpack and make it a little easier on my body to be going to college. This is coming off about 6 months worth of being very sedentary, and it really shows with my energy level and how tired I get. To some, 2 classes is a piece of cake, to me, it's a challenge. To complete these 2 classes will be quite an acheivement.
However, it's a challenge I want to make every step possible to be on a positive side of, to set myself up for as much success as possible...if I get a B in a small quiz, can I get a B on an exam and get a B in the whole course ?? I hope so.
I hope to be able to take 3 courses this coming spring semester...how I do on both of these classes will help make my decision for me !!
I just weighed my backpack : 10 pounds with my Spanish 2 binder/book...so it seems the balancing thing could be a necessity...that is quite a lot for my back to be carrying, and with another book in it, it might be 12-13 pounds. I shall also jettison all items I can do " without", because I have no intention of a heavy backpack sidelining me on attending college !!

Another Saturday ...

2004-08-28T21:04:00.000-07:00

chaosinorder.com has another " column" of mine, this way in the form of poetry. It feels sort of raw and simple, even a little too intimate in spots, but hey, it's what came out of me...

I know I have been slightly neglectful of this blog as of lately. I am going to attempt to show up more often...the adjustment of going to college etc. took some extra energy for me. I took a rest day today, and I feel like I need to make sure I do this every week.
My first quiz turned out okay- I got a B-, which I'd be happy to maintain !! I'd love to improve my attitude, focus etc. so much I get a B in this Spanish 2 class. One thing I am picking up is one of my biggest faults is fear of details. I think I have to rush through everything, get it if not the first time, the second time, and not take time to slow down and actually understand what it is I am studying or doing ...I feel like I am wasting people's time by going slow...so I end up skimming and not getting too close to mastery and depth. This pretty much answers the reason why I've not gained a field of expertise in my life.
My anthropology class is wonderful...but I need to slow down there, also, I need to pay attention !! I was writing by hand some answers to a reaction quiz about a film...and I was just so frustrated at how slow pen and paper seemed to be. I also had a problem concentrating on what I was writing and what the teacher was discussing...so of course, I need to figure out the priorities of what I need to pay attention to.
What's distracting me right now ? The heat...it's very warm outside- about 85, and probably just that warm inside my apartment !! It's hard to write anything when it's so hot...

Backpack

2004-08-22T22:23:00.000-07:00

I bought a backpack this summer for college. It's a dark wine-purple color. I love that particular family of colors, wine, purple, lavender, lilac, mauve, from warm Italian tones to cool English, royal to pale barely there. So it just suited me to get a nice wine purple backpack.
It's got a small compartment for small things. I have about 3 pens, and a highlighter or two there. A few kleenexes ...spare bus transfers. My bus transfers...yikes. By the time I get out of language lab and stopping to get some groceries, not neccessarily in that order, or maybe also a slice of pizza...the 2 hour limit is 2 to 3 hours over with. I prefer kleenexes in travelpacks, it's neater. I have my keys also. I have a keychain with a dinosaur playing a ukelale, with some writing that says " Hawaii"...I've had this for about 10 years. A co-worker gave me a choice of three...and this was the least obnoxious. Now I am oddly attached to it.
Then there are two other larger compartments.
In one, would be my dictionary,workbook( if I plan on going to the lab...),Spanish text,and maybe a book called English Grammar for Students of Spanish by Spinelli ( a wonderful book...I recommend it ! )...unforuntately I haven't been brave enough to include my 501 spanish verbs yet. Second compartment has a binder...with a notebook.The binder is divided up into 10 sections...this all in all must weigh around 10 pounds or so. I am sure I will begin to feel stronger in about 3 weeks, because during summer that was about the time it took for me to feel the beginning of some change...
or of course, on my Cultural Anthropology days, it would be one lonely textbook, a notebook...but some Spanish 2 stuff, as I plan on doing lab that day.
It's a sort of fitness program, my backpack is.

Semester begins

2004-08-17T22:26:00.000-07:00

I just started fall semester.
Spanish 2 is going be taking about 10 hours every week...5-7 hours homework, and 2 hours lab...and of course, extra stuff like studying for tests, which she advises in her syllabis comes every 4 classes...
Yikes.
I am glad I dropped the computer literacy class. Tomorrow is going to be a big study day, and let's just say I am trying to concentrate on what is needed in the moment.

I'll probably have about 5-6 hours of reading etc. a week for Anthropology as well. We shall see !!

comme moi

2004-08-14T05:43:00.000-07:00

Chaosinorder.com now contains my first column, 4 short little pieces on spiders,whispers,mountains and coffee. It includes stuff about fear, my parents, growing up in Southern California and uh, coffee.

More additions to website list !

2004-08-13T01:00:00.000-07:00

Next week I plunge back into college courses. I am taking Spanish 2, and Cultural Anthropology. I hope to use this blog at least 3-4 days a week to help my Spanish homework, even in just a breif review or " palabra de dia" note...If I do get a job, I am sure that a few days week I'll be swamped with the job and not too available to do this blog.
I have added the American Association of Anthropologist Net...I am not a member and most certainly do not represent this association, but it seemed like a great site to branch off from...
I also included another organisation, Writer's Guild of America, West. I am not a member of that organisation , nor do I represent them in anyway, however, this also seemed like a good link for information I want to keep apprised of.

WEBSITE NEWS
I am going to use this website as a learning tool for both my classes, and a place to do some writing exercises. Occasionally I may vent or rant or do something a little " different", and I may also occasionally do an entry about coffee. Most of the ranting or venting will be about college, or writing.
I hope to come to this site at least 4 days a week from mid August to mid December ( this is when I'll be attending college...) and there is also my other blog, which I'll cut down to 2-4 days a week. My other blog is : mutteringsmalltalk.blogspot.com... which is more personal, more eclectic, including items about movies, fanfic, politics and just general blogging " stuff".

And I bought lotsa books today...

I got some great deals at the local bookstore , Copperfeilds', which is closing it's doors late August. The site has been open for...probably at least 15 years if not more ! It started as a 50-50 new/used site, and slowly went to a mostly used. I bought books at used store prices, with 60% off. I couldn't resist.
Copperfeilds is a small independent bookstore with locations in Napa and Sonoma County.
I bought :

Thirteen Senses by Victor Villasenor
Elizabeth, The Struggle for the Throne by David Starkey
A Guided Journal for Medicine Cards, Making Medicine by David Carson
An Editor's Advice for Writers , The Forest for the Trees by Betsy Lerner

Website added

2004-08-12T21:23:00.000-07:00

I have added a new website to my list of links. I'll be doing a Saturday column there...The Spider Whispers Mountains to the Coffee ...I may or may not mention mountains or coffee or spiders or whispers...but I'll make an effort. The website is ChaosinOrder.com and will have 7 different columns, and will most likely include vagabonding walkabouts through Chaosinorder's poetry, ADHD, Bob Dylan and writing on divers other subjects. I also recommend his pictures, he has a visual sense that is quite interesting.
I'll be writing my column under the nickname/screenname KPFW, short for Kaplaghfinewhatever, which is my Wilwheatondotnet's Soapbox name. I met ChaosinOrder through WWDN, but Chaosinorder.com will be unique to CIO's own vision for his own website.

Desk

2004-08-12T21:07:00.000-07:00

1 thing I can do to improve my college experience? Clear my desk off. Having a deskspace would be great. I have a desk but it is right now holding :
Various cups/glasses/a dish or three...
Old Laptop I don't use
Decorations : candles and some candies
Books. We are talking serious clutter serious unusable space.
I have piles of books and magzines and stuff all around the desk and entryway to desk. This further blocks said desk.So I need to clear the path to the desk. I need to clear off the desk.

On the other side....

2004-08-09T01:21:00.000-07:00

Writer's Book of Days By Judy Reeves
has " On the Other Side " as a prompt.

" On the Other Side"...
I think of death and change and different points of view. I think of death as something that seems nearer now that I am getting older. Little reminders of how close death is to other people. I saw a man on the pavement the other day. He has many "other sides" contained in one small scenario. I thought at first he was passed out drunk... then perhaps he was sunstroke- the sun was bright and it was hot. I know I don't always hydrate, and he had a jacket on, he could easily have had fainted from hunger and sun. He might have been homeless, a lot of people without a steady source of shelter come here especially between March and October because it's " fairly mild" and the crime rate isn't " that bad". It's probably not fun or safe or easy to drag a peice of street over you as some sort of bunkbed anywhere, but this is a small city where it's maybe not as risky as others. I also thought to myself...maybe he is sick. Maybe he is dead. There so many possiblities crumpled up on the park pavement. The policeman cautiously circled around him, put on latex gloves, looked around at the few other people either sitting on the benches or grass, or just passing by like I was. I was off to a movie. I also decided to let the police and the man on the pavement have a little privacy and walked away, not looking anymore.

Ranting and whiney department

2004-08-05T19:15:00.000-07:00

1 thing I can do to improve my college experience? Well, I did it. I dropped the computer literacy class, because I felt it was the best thing for me to do, was just having two classes. I felt wimpy and weak, but hey, I guess I am wimpy and weak !! I have heard so many stories of strong re-entry women...super women...kids and jobs and families and fulltime school loads.
I do not have kids, or a family or even a S.O. ( not even on the horizon...) and I don't have a job ( yet...I want 20-30 hours ...) but I just feel like I cannot handle more than a measly 7 units.
I got a bit lost here and there during the summer, so I figure 2 classes, albiet less concentrated and intensive should be almost okay...

I met with a career counselor today and ended up crying after. I thought I didn't have to worry about math. I had a BA ( in drama, dance emphasis...) and thought math was behind me because I took care of that requirement ( not well...I saw my grade for it and uh...math isn't my strong point...) so...
First, I hadn't had anything to eat and it was morning, and last night I had a bout with super-insomnia. I had had some coffee at around 7p and that does seem to effect me...so I was slightly spacey . I got a bagel and coffee and hightailed it over to the office, on time, even !!
The counselor had " never had anyone eat" a " snack" in her office before, and wouldn't let me...it was my breakfast but anyway...I drank coffee.
I think we weren't compatable, counselor and I...she seemed too perky, too chirpy...
We spoke about some career stuff, and me dropping the computer class, and she got to my past history and some dismal grades I had. She erased these grades- that was nice.
I advised her I was thinking of going into Cultural Resource Management, at SSU. It's an MA program.
She advised me most graduate degrees make you take statistics.
My heart dropped. I paniced. In my slightly spaced out way, with only a couple of hours sleep, statistics sounded to me " oh by the way, in order to get this MA, you have to walk up 10 flights of really steep stairs while dogs bark at you and growl from barely secure cages" ( as a bathmophobe and kynophobe this is bad...)
I snapped , "I cannot take statistics !"
She looked taken aback by my mild snapping( on a a snappage scale, around a 4...), like she was afronted and slightly frightened...redirecting the conversation to how nice a gift it was that she erased the bad grades from my record...
I then explained that my math thing was beyond anxiety, it was like a phobia.
She looked a little concerned about.. what? It felt to me that she looked at me like I was unstable. She advised me that concerning my math...thing...that I might be waived because of it. Like...I was insane or ready to pop. I had calmed down right after the snappage by the way, and in fact, become rather dejected. My heart had sunk, and I advised her I might as well walk out the door and give up.
She just went on being perky. Cheerful.
" Don't do that...contact the MA program..."
I thanked her, said goodbye... left probably looking like a deflated balloon. I figured if I had to take math, it would add 3-4 semesters of painstakingly boring, hard, difficult and distracting classes..remedial, pre-algebra,algebra,stats...it all piled upon me. I would probably give up if I had to take those classes. I am not mathematically inclined.
I sat and ate my bagel, cried a bit while getting home and at home, and slept.
I am now trying to un-discourage myself. I am trying to re-motivate myself. Trying to keep in mind that this woman didn't know what Cultural Resource ( she wrote it Research) Management was (I don't know much myself, I must admit...but it sounds like a feild I could learn about gladly and participate in...) and had misinterpreted me saying San Jose instead of SSU.
The whole stats requirement might just be...applicable to management career tracks and such.
I hope. I need to contact the Master's program...I will take some career tests...and might ask for another counselor. I am sure this one wouldn't mind never seeing me again.

It's time to go get something to eat. I am starving, the bagel didn't quite cut it and I want to go out somewhere.

8 days a week....

2004-08-05T01:30:00.000-07:00

from the Writer's Book of Days ....
If Only...
If only I could physically manifest my perfect little town. I'd like around 120,000 people. I'd like 3 sections of town- Uptown, Midtown,Downtown( north to south )...
Uptown includes a small mall- around 45 stores...across from it is a 6plex....which is at its northmost point;then a small business park of about a 25 mid sized businesses( from dotcoms to telecommunications, utilities offices, to some dental/ medical employing from 10-50 people each) , and small retirement community , and the housing is a bit problematic, little towards the sprawling side...mostly built post 1950 and includes some of the more expensive homes in the city... heading east but they've got the sprawl under control in the past decade and there are about 5 small farms left !!However, they boast a grand old house, the Ranchero Ramirez, built in 1844, and a few smaller Victorian immediately near the Ranchero... as well as a few very new lowcost apartment complexes.
On the south end of the Uptown area, a convention center area was built in the 1970's ( about 40-45 conventions a year...), which can accomadate a convention up to 5,000 people and has 2 regular science fiction/fantasy conventions( mid-May, late October), as well as a bookfair in Feb each year , with some major and smaller hotels to accomodate a schedule that is booked pretty solid from Feb through October ; the Convention Center of Tomasina employs around 300 people ....directly south of the convention center is...some more high density housing such as 4-5 storied apt complexes and a few condo complexes...as well as one small stripmall with a variety of restaurants and services...then south to:
a moderately sized park, with emphasis on family freindliness ...seperating Uptown from Midtown. Midtown is directly south from the park... and a few grand Victorians, including the grand old jewel of an estate, the Leighlan House , built 1889 and then...
Midtown is an All American Square , around which you would find City Government, Hall, a few established office buildings of Victorian Era of about2-3 stories, a small hospital, a decent sized fire department/police station, a huge old library which also houses a nice regional museum, an old fashioned cinema with only 2 screens, mostly indies/ arthouse/older films...an area called Midtown Oldtown... street of about 4 blocks by 4 blocks known for interesting shops( the most unique is a railroad enthuthiast shop ) and boutiques, a few cafes( including Cafe Jasmine, the famous jazz club...), restaurants.... along with a couple of hotels and B&B's ( total bed capacity=450)and some service oriented businesses such as laundrimat, hair stylist, pizza parlor, grocery store , pharmacy,gas stations. Also, this section would include a some more grand old Victorians and Edwardians, to smaller houses mostly built before 1940, to a few very modern apartment buildings of 5 stories, and all in all...very pedestrian freindly. There would be a great midtown summers farmer market every wednesday, from 430p to 9p , from midmay to early october...that is held throughout Midtown Oldtown... Oldest house in Midtown is the graceful Howzer Estate, built in 1873.
Seperating Midtown from Downtown would be the railroads, including a beautiful old depot wherein there would be 48 trains a day, from all points of the nation... Downtown would begin at the Furniture Factory ( established 1885; presently employing 1200 people) including a 5 b y 5 block of housing that was built on land owned previously by the Furniture factory... this tract was built in 1952, and is mostly 3-5 bedroom houses, and nearly half are owned/rented by workers in the factory...with a 100 unit apartment building as well.
Then comes the Downtown Plaza a lovely old sqaure with a small ampitheatre with an audience capacity of 300-350 , built in an elegant Californian spanish misson style, the west side dominated by the old mission( established 1788) and the fairly ( built 1912) new Catholic Cathedral... the northside would be the 10plex movie theatre, the carpark ( as all car trtaffic is banned directly around the plaza square, southside would be the famous " media" store, LyonsAllMedia. Alongside LyonsAllMedia- which has books, dvd's , cd's, games, software, etc. and all the technology needed to deal with it all- computers, dvd players etc... ( founded 1983) would be a wonderful old grocery-general goods store, Rafael's( founded 1898). Rafael's has been owned and operated by the same three families since 1898...Ortiz, Zamora and Sanlucia. On each street is also found a cafe and a restaurant or two.
Housing stretches out from this area for about 15 blocks by 2 blocks, to the west...ending at the city limits ...then along the Redwood Throughway which passes dairyland, vinyards,small farms, small towns ( about 5, sized from around 25,000 to 5,000) and after 30 miles, the ocean.
Eastside part of the plaza is where the College starts. It has a teaching hospital which is state of the art... the College, goes east for about 10 blocks. the College is known for its encouragement of the arts , environmental science and medicine, and also has an excellent small museum of art and native arts. There are 20,000 undergraduates, and 5,000 graduate students. Staff, faculty and other employees number from 1500-1800 for the last decade. the College was founded in 1910, and has 25 % re-entry students, over 27 years of age. It also boasts 12 % international students, and an amazing " sliding scale" tuition, dependent on financial need, number of units taken, residency, and merit. The College area includes on it's eastmost part, a small stripmall of about a dozen stores, including a grocery store and the infamous laundrimat-bowling alley-internet cafe joint called Dishoramma...founded in 1999, and extremely popular.

Directly south of the plaza would be the 3rd major employer in town...the graphics/games/software Company. They employ 500 people. They were founded in 1994 and really helped attract a few smaller dotcoms that are found clustered near them and then for about 10 blocks more there is housing...
Housing is excellent, however a little denser and mostly in a smaller scale throughout the Dowtown area , and mainly from 3 eras : 1880-1900; 1910-1930 and 1995 on...Colonial Spanish and Victorian styles dominate this section of town. it boasts three of the oldest houses = The Velasquez Adobe and Grounds, from 1790 to 1840...; The Macaffee Mansion, from 1867; and the Cheng cottage, from 1870...Just outside the city limits to the south is the famous Macaffee Horitcultural Gardens, heavily sponsored by major businesses in town...
Throughout the town:
The bus system is excellent, 25 cents for students under 18 with proper id, buspass for the year a mere 300 $ or 30$ a month...75 cents anywhere with 3 hour transfers... with buses running even from 11p-6a, albiet only once an hour during that " downtime". Employment is good to excellent... housing..fairly inexpensive ( 3 bedroom houses run around 150,000-200,000$..., a modest 2 bedroom apartment would average $600...a sweet little sutdio can still be had for around 350$ ...)
There would only be one macdonalds, one tacobell, one burger king in this town. That's all. Not one big boxstore is found within city limits !! There are no Starbucks, however there are 35 different cafe's and half are open til 2 am, and three are open 24 hours !!
Midtown does have a very nice Trader Joes. and Uptown has a very coolio Borders.
There have been 24 movies filmed here from 1946 to present day... from a thriller in 1946, to a few famous horror films...to oneTV series in the late 80's to mid 90's (1988-1993)
If only....
some more about my imaginary village, called after one of my favorite childhood movies. Tomasina. Population 120,000...average age, 36...demographics: 52 % women, 48 % men...30% Hispanic, 20 % black, 15% Aisan,10 % " other" and 30% white . Political affiliation : 40% democratic, 25% Greens, 10% libertarian ( yes we have a small medical marijuana office midtown...) and 25% republican.Uptown median salary: 44,000$, midtown:42,000$, downtown, 40,000$...
There are 10 districts and 20 councilmembers, 2 from each district. There is an elected mayour ...mayour and councilmembers have a 5 year term presently at 55,000$ a year. Districts are approximately 10% of the city each, in a strictly strip pattern...north to south...
Presently there are 3 republicans, 5 greens, 2 libertarians...10 democrats on the town council, and the mayor is a green. 12 women, 8 men. There are 5 councilmembers over 60, 10 between 40-60 and 5 under 40. The Mayor is 49, Alison Chavez, born and raised here.
Tomasina is also known for it's 3 microbreweries uptown...
If this sounds like some odd combination of some of the best parts of this, that and the other place in Northern California...it should.

1 thing I can do to improve my college experience?
I might just cut out one class, the computer literacy class. I want to set myself up to succeed, and am afraid that 3 classes might be too much for me in particular to handle.

putting one foot forward ...

2004-08-01T19:31:00.000-07:00

gapingvoid ...Some good to very good , some excellent advice about creativity...

1 thing I can do to improve my college experience? Keep to a reasonable schedule ... Allow some time each day to be by myself, to relax, to do something a little different, to study all three subjects everyday, to take breaks, and of course, to forget about micromanaging every minute because that never works for me.

everybody knows the dice are loaded...

2004-07-30T15:43:00.000-07:00

The exercise last night prompts me to write about a scent ....

All I can think about with scents is how they add to memories so much for me, and how I love going to a store downtown that has all sorts of soaps and lotions and candles...
There is a lotion I bought in San Francisco called Bare Escentual's Spring Showers...when I put it on, I am transported to the Queen Ann Hotel and wandering through SF, and I really do feel refreshed. It's subtle scent after the first few minutes, and permeates my clothing in a nice way. I just cannot quite decide which scent I like best...vanilla? It is warm and cozy...grapefruit, invigorating and clear...summery. Lavender...I've loved lavender for years and years...it's a basic background fragrance for me, it means home and self and yes, it does have a clean scent, it can make me feel younger. However...I also love eucalyptus. It is fresher than anything, it is almost minty. It is invigorating and also helps scent the clothes, and yes, I like ginger. I like spiciness.
So what scents would I like to have around ? I love coffee. Coffee means sitting down in a cafe, reading a book, looking at people go by, talking to people after a really good meal. Coffee is a scent I wouldn't want in a lotion. I want to drink it. I don't even see much use in coffee scented candles. i want to smell the real thing. I can smell it and instantly want coffee. There is nothing more aweful than smelling coffee that smells great and tastes like metallic shavings coated in brown ash. But one scent above all do I really miss...my mom's cookies. Especially during Christmas...when she used to, when she was feeling well, make about 8 different kinds of cookies. Above all...chocolate chip cookies equals lots of mom memories going through the brain. She would make chocolate chip cookies about once a month for about 5 years running during my girlhood. It also brings memories of me cooking them at the old house, and my dad would eat one...and say he wanted to make sure they tasted good, so he would eat another. They're both gone now. But homemade chocolate chip cookies and the smell conjures up their spirits ...and even the thought of making cookies, of smelling cookies, of their scents brings up mom and dad's presence.

~~~ *** ~~~ *** ~~~ *** ~~~ *** ~~~ *** ~~~ *** ~~~
1 thing I can do to improve my college experience? Study habits. Study styles. I of course need a study space in my apartment, I need to clear cluttery stuff so I can feel freer to do what I need to do...but I need to study without feeling like I am spinning my wheels. I need to know that what I am doing is helping me get something in my head not hindering. When do I stop for a breather? When do I stop for the day ? Are all my notes well taken notes or ...? If I blow it this semester, or feel lost after the first few weeks, other than going the tutoring route, I am going to take a study habits class or something. I want to give myself a real chance on this working right. I have such a tendency to fall back on unproductive habits...I don't want to do it this time.

Hey Ho here we go....

2004-07-29T14:38:00.000-07:00

1 thing I can do to improve my college experience? Focus. Concentrate on the 3 classes, the 3 subjects : Computer Literacy,Spanish 2 and Cultural Anthropology. Keep distractions to a minimum...reduce clutter everywhere, from my bookmarks to my apartment Reduce clutter in my head. I am going to start this before my classes begin.I want to establish a habit of focus and I am gonna work on getting rid of one distraction a day.

some things...

2004-07-28T22:13:00.000-07:00

Writing exercise :
Every night..
I think I'm gonna get to bed earlier, or sleep better, or will I sleep at all? I toss and turn , especially before dental appointments, first time to class, or finals, and going somewhere new or to the airport. Before my final, I couldn't get cooled down or warm enough...I kept waking up...and I think that was part of my problem taking the final.
I sometimes drink too much caffiene and poof. There goes my hope of sleep. Tonight I've had an almond iced latte, and nursed the last half for about 2 hours. Soooo, as I drink the last 2 sips, I'll be up for at least 6 hours fueled on that.
Sometimes every night is punctuated by some dude rummaging through the garbage next door. The cans are under my bedroom window, so are gas hook ups and so I don't--cannot--- have a small porchlike thingie that my three neighbors have had added onto their apartments ...the landlord added the porchalike thingies around 1995, same year as a neighbor had a " companion" dog which actually wasn't a " companion dog" at all. It was the main reason I went to get counseling, that stupid faux companion dog.
Other times, I get into a habit of Tylenol PM ...haven't done that for quite a while. At least six months or more. I limit it to 10 days and stop for a while because they say 10 days is the limit recommended. But it is a nice oblivion...sinking into sleep that way.
I also found out over-resting can be a very unfit thing. I have overslept the last couple of days, because whilest going to college I would wake up around 615am , and that was after getting to bed around 230am( about 4-5 times, even later...) ...a habit I got from a long hiatus I took this past year of most of the time going to bed whenever I wanted...and being a swingshift worker for 14 years ( that means that about 65% of that time, I'd get to bed around 2 am )...so waking up at 6 am was a big deal, and it shook my body a little doing it. Sooo I thought I needed extra rest. Probably did, but my body feels a little creaky today so I hope to nip that bad habit in the bud. Besides, I've got stuff I'd like to do tomorrow... get up and spend some time with a freind, see the sunny shine... read a book...and feel a little better physically !!

1 thing I can do to improve my college experience? Eating better. Sometimes I think my brain was a little bit starved, because once in a while I'd do my old trick of skipping a meal or two because of the weird hours I kept.

2004-07-27T22:32:00.000-07:00

The final is over. Done. I'm gonna pick up my tests/book/workbooks etc. and go on , come Friday and study maybe an hour a day. I felt nervous and I looked at everything and it was like...the last 2 chapters had bounced...ping, pong...off my brainpan. I need to move on and study well so Spanish 2 isn't a total loss !!
I am taking a 2 day break from th whole collegiate thing. Then I go back and see what I can do to restructure my life toward it being a smoother experience.

1 thing I can do to improve my college experience? Setting up a decent study area- my desk, chair, nice lamp, and setting aside 1-3 special study sessions a week where I go to one of my favorite local cafes and treat myself to something good. Making sure I have study space, both exterior and interior, at home and some place away from college & home

I'll be doing my final soon...

2004-07-26T22:17:00.000-07:00

Final coming up...I am nervous. I know there's about 30% of the last 3 chapters I just don't get. I know there are things I blank out on ...
I am also reassessing what I did the last 6 weeks. I seem to have lost some momentum especially the last 2 weeks. I am going to to try to evaluate what I need to change. I am going to try to limit each post to one thing...even it it's a minor item ...as it pops up in my mind.
I am hoping for a 85 % but expecting a 72 %...if it's lower than 72 % I don't know if I'll even get a "C" grade !! I'm just hoping I will have learnt from my study habit weaknesses and improve even 15 % this coming fall.

1 thing I can do to improve my college experience? Relax before going to sleep. My best days were when I had around 7-8 hours of sleep, and my best-best days were when I did some relaxing before sleeping. I need more sleep, I need to relax everyday.

Practice, anxiety, and uh...

2004-07-25T22:13:00.000-07:00

Practice !!
I got 2 books to help me with Spanish=Practical Spanish Grammar by Marcial Prado...
Spanish Pronouns and Prepositions/ Practice Makes Perfect series by Dorothy Richamond.
I hope they help me review ...I also need to do that for the nearly 3 weeks without Spanish while I wait for the new semester.

Anxiety !!!
Exclamation marks !
My back is kinda achey...I carry a lot in my backpack, and I need to probably get a small purse to hold my personal stuff and notebook stuff, to kinda even out the weight.
I had a great talk with this guy who made me feel better about my Californian accent, and he's been here from Guadlajara for 13 years and still has an accent... he says " eveybody" has a accent, and to not worry about being perfect with pronounciation but to concentrate on communication. I am taking that to heart as much as my professor advising me to " trust myself"...
However, I am still anxious about my final. I won't know about the grade til probably 1 week from Wednesday... eeek.
I guess I'll need to get to bed way early, and do all sorts of relaxation exercises beforehand, and do my ritual " get a cupajoe and a goodie and go over whatever I can for 45 minutes before hand..."

Uh...
writing exercise now...
Judy Reeves' Writers Book of Days
Write about asking for mercy...

I am sure I've asked for mercy before, but I cannot remember except when I used to pray...however, the quality of mercy is needed today. It's needed in that if we withdraw from Iraq, it will show a kind of mercy. To withdraw over the next 90 days, to make sure we give basic aid and some extra help to each and every village wherein it is possible to do so...but to withdraw. To be gone by say...November 1. Yes, I know that's cutting it close to election time. I still wouldn't vote Bush back into office. I would see no point. He and I don't agree on possibly 80% of our political agenda, and so I'd see no " mercy" or " justice" to me or to him in voting for him. To stop the killing and chaos, it would take more than a reasonable 90 days withdrawal... but it's up to the Iraqi people. They need help, yes, and so we should give them some basic get back on their feet help...but they don't want an occupying force, nor do they seem to want our help past some infrastructural and aid ( food, medical, shelter , power...) type help. Compassion would dictate aid where needed, and get the heck out of there. It would also be merciful to our own troops and their families. Finish what they can and then give the men and women some leave, a good( like 4 months pay and 2 weeks vacation with their immediate family to anywhere in the states..) bonus and help the military deal with the aftermath that will be coming from injuries and psycholigical effects. Let's tend to our own nation, let's show a little kindness and mercy towards those who need it here.

Somethin taken...

2004-07-24T20:48:00.000-07:00

I got this from 13th Hour blog, and where he got it is in his blog, so visit it please...it's over on my links.
Survey :
Last cigerette = 24 years ago, Junghaus, 1-2 coughing puffs.
Last alcoholic drink= 1-2 months ago, small glass of Irish Mist
Last car ride = 2 weeks ago or so...
Last kiss = I don't tell.
Last good cry = about a week ago
Last library book = I don't remember...
Last book bought = Just a Geek by Wil Wheaton ( unless you count my Cultural Anthro books for my class...)
Last Book read ? = finished? Humans by Robert Sawyer...currently reading ? Just a Geek and My Life by Bill Clinton
Last movie seen in theatres= Harry Potter and POA
Last Movie rented = El Ultimo Tren
Last Beverege drank = Vanilla Iced Latte
Last food consumed = chocolate chip cookie
Last Crush = some guy at some cafe I am sure...
Last Phonecall= 2 nights ago
Last TV show watched= I don't have cable or satellite...I've got DVD's though, and I am slowly going through Forever Knight, for the second time since I bought it about 4? months ago...
Last time showered = around 2p today
Last CD played = Soundtrack to Cold Mountain, playing right now !
Last item bought = small notebook to help me study for my final
Last download= nada, gracias, lo siento...
Last annoyance= the weight of my backpack
Last disappointment= Wednesday
Last soda drink = coke
Last thing written= I wrote in this blog and my other blog just before this...
Last key used= for my front door.
Last words spoken = " I am sorry you guys are closing..." to one of the Copperfeild's booksellers.
Last chair sat in = at Peet's
Last webpage= 13th hour blog

I know this is slightly off the usual path for this blog, but since 13th hour links to me through this blog and I took this from his blog, I figured doing this survey here would be somehow...logical...

Oh a time...and a time again

2004-07-24T19:42:00.000-07:00

It's almost final time. Final is 3 days away. Today I reviewed some important information from Chapter 1-3, and 7. Tomorrow I'll do the same for 4-6, and 7...and Monday I'll review vocabulary and one " shaky" item from each chapter, especially chapter 7. I also plan to make verb and vocabulary flashcards the next few days.

A Conversation ...
I had a short conversation between a Peet's employee and myself about time and Clinton and then, of course Wil Wheaton ! He asked me, " How is it going...?" to which I replied, fine etc. Then I told him the time in Beijing and Moscow, according to a map that was in my Spanish book. We went on about Bill Clinton for some reason, and how he was extremely wealthy now, from the book...and I recommended Just a Geek by Wil Wheaton. He advised me that he would try and either get the book for his 35 year old fellow employee, who is at a " crossroads" or recommend it to him. I had advised him that it was a good book for someone who was thinking of changing their life and " felt too old". I especially recommend this book to people who are thinking of doing something new, especially of they're between 25 and 35, and particularly if they're stepparents and/ or geeks.
( writing prompt from A Writer's Book of Days by Judy Reeves )

On another note...
One of the local fixtures since...1985 ? or thereabouts, Copperfeild's Books, on 4th in Santa Rosa, is going out of business. Until around 8/14 or so, they're selling books at 25 -50% off used book prices ! However, it's not all happiness. It's sad. There is another used bookstore-a mere half a block away, Treehorn Books. It's packed to the gills and is quite marvelous. It's small but it's a good place to find quite a variety of books. Copperfeilds used to be, until 2-3 years ago, used and new, then they reduced their new to around 25 % then down to about 10%...and now. They'll be gone from downtown, having survived around 10 years or so of Barnes&Noble ( and yes, I shopped there off and on...) being across the street. Now there will be Barnes & Noble, and Treehorn...and Sawyers, which has a small inventory of best sellers, local issues oriented books, travel guides, and lotsa lotsa antiBush tomes. The nearest Copperfeilds will be at Montgomery Village. I put 3 books on hold at the downtown Copperfeilds ...AS Byatt novel...Obstacle Race by Germaine Greer, and a autobiography by Judy Chicago.I don't feel too bad about going to B&N occasionally...I went to Copperfeilds alot also, my highest time of book buying traffic was probably 2000-2003 . Too much, actually. It was a cozy place to be able to go to...I guess every 6 weeks a special feildtrip to the bookstore in the other Santa Rosa location will be in order !! Santa Rosa downtown is slowly losing its focus and flavor... and I know I'll probably move sometime after I get my MA and hopefully land some wonderful job in a museum somewhere... about 4-5 years down the road. It's sad to see, but it might be easier to leave Santa Rosa if almost everything I enjoy downtown is slowly picked away.
If I was an investor, I'd go to Railroad Square or environs, or near Santa Rosa JC. Railroad Square has some commercial and retail space nearby open, and some nice houses just ready to be modestly fixed up. SRJC has the Mendocino Ave corridor , with 30,000 JC students eager to crowd around and study at a cafe, or eat or shop... They are building a 5 story garage, and I am sure the shopping/eating will increase some, especially just after the peak time of 7a-12p all around !!

I am almost done...

2004-07-23T01:10:00.000-07:00

I am almost finished with Spanish 1. I hope to get in at least 2-3 hours of studying during the day.
I'll do the writing exercise later , after I do my final studying...

Time passes slowly up...

2004-07-20T22:04:00.000-07:00

The writer's book of days has this assignment...Passing of Time...
which considering tomorrow is my birthday is wonderfully appropriate...
Birthday wish list is at mutteringsmalltalk

Passing of Time...
It goes fast. I am slightly to severely time dyslexic. I'll say ...5 weeks before an event or holiday or vacation...I've plenty of time. I'll do a little bit here and there to prepare. Two weeks before, I'll say...oh, I don't have to worry about it and I might do another 5 % of the stuff I have to do to prepare...and a few days before the event...I'll still say oh, plenty of time...
Then...I am on top of the date.The holiday is 2 days away or the visit that I need to clean up for is 3 days away...the birthday of a freind is a week away or that day or last Sunday...and here I am...card in hand, unsent...apartment needing about 4 days to get it even 70% clean,last Sunday is so embarrasing I just don't call at all!! Unless I have severe penalties or am really together ...I may either do a rush job of doing something, anything for that event, or just shine it on. I am also pretty much way too lax about contacting people. I'll say to someone...." I need to pay more attention to you..." or " We need to see each other more often..." and poof...before I know it, it's been 5 weeks since I said that, and another week before I contact the person, and we end up seeing each other just as sporadically as before. I cannot totally blame the other person for not contacting me, as sometimes my telephone is off due to not plugging it in after my surfing the internet is done.
Yes, time passes. Slowly, fast, and sometimes while we are sleeping or making plans or learning Spanish !!

I have 2 more classes. I have 7 chapters to review. Chapter 7 is included in the final...which is this coming Tuesday. Considering my average percentage for the tests have been 76%, I really need a nice solid 85% to lift it up a little...I guess concentrating on my weakest points of knowledge, and my strengths would be a solid way to go.

My fall semester starts mid-August. I hope to keep reviewing Spanish whilest I am on break, and am taking Spanish 2, Cultural Anthropology and Computer Literacy. I hope I can handle all this, hope I can get a decent job 16-20 hours a week. On an extremely weird and selfish note, I hope everything goes smoothly this next 4-5 months, and it hardly like..maybe 7 days ...ever , from October through December, gets below 50 after 6 am through 10p. It's just more convenient to not have to be so cold in the mornings, and more pleasant not to have to deal with cold during the day.

A movement and showing up and houses...

2004-07-19T00:10:00.000-07:00

Well, here I am, showing up again !!
The Writer's Book of Days, 7/18 ( I am a day behind, I'll try and write something later that has the prompt for 7/19 )
Write about a recurring dream...

One set of recurring dreams I have are about houses. I move into a new apartment. I spend time at an elaborate Victorian house. I have a house full of roommates. Thew new apartment always has something I'd like in my present " hovel "...extra space, a sunny prospect. The Victorian house is full of rooms and rooms, sensuous bathrooms especially ! I wander for some deep purpose that rarely is remembered past the dream, and my bathing experiences are always like a spirtual awakening in these dreams. Intense emotions are contained within these baths I take. Of course, there are the dreams about roommates. I am not a good candidate for roommate-hood. I am not very organised. I like my own space and like to hear what I want to hear. The dreams about roomates often involve complicated searches for the right room for each person to move in, or some sort of disagreement about the room etc.

* Final Few Days of Class *

The next 9 days are " eeek, I have to do 15 hours of lab...and study for the final...and chapter 7 test..." so I might make myself scarce a few days, especially Wednesday, the day before the test, and next weekend before the final on Tuesday.
I think I may get my "C" grade !!
I'll only be able to do that by taking this class very seriously for the next 9 days...getting plenty of rest, studying everyday for the next...9 days...and eating really well and sanely, so i can concentrate on what I need to do...which is pass these next 2 tests, and maybe just maybe get an 85 on one. I'd be happy to do that. Of course, my brain will need a rest, so I'll have to come in here and on the net for an hour or so, just to kinda shake up the neurons slightly.
Monday goal :
Study the first 25 % of Chapter 7.Do the first 30 % of the workbook.. Review Chapter 1...do labwork.

2004-07-18T00:06:00.000-07:00

This is the Big Hand in front of one of the local malls..asking for money, credit cards...etc...

2004-07-17T23:24:00.000-07:00

This is me, but the picture before this might not be...I am just learning this process...

Some changes here ...read and buy this book...

2004-07-17T22:07:00.000-07:00

I hope this is a nice warm looking blue. I guess the huge font on one of my entries is kinda a big error...however, I am keeping it up as an example to myself as to what I don't want to do! I had a latte about 3 hours ago, and am very much up...up...up...which is a good CD by Ani Defranco.
I changed my template so I could include linkage here.
Thanks to Latinopundit, I have some blogs to recommend :
culturekitchen
Latinawriter
sensoryoverload

He has other linkage to Latina blogs, but these caught my eye and I hope other's also. I am reading blogs about Latino/a culture to enrich my study of Spanish. I appreciate them being in English because I am not quite ready to read blogs "en español" yet.
You may see quite a lot of writing tonight from me if I stay up thanks to the vanilla cafe latte...

Also, I bought an excellent book this evening = Just a Geek by Wil Wheaton, I highly recommend it.

2004-07-17T02:22:00.000-07:00

My writing book , A Writer's Book of Days, by Judy Reeves, has a variety of exercises, and one writing prompt for every day of the year.
July 17 is : In a state of disarray...
That's my whole apartment. I have a messy habit of being a slob. Slothful. I don't do much clearing, cleaning, organising, etc. around my small apartment. I wish I had a room where I could throw it all in, and slowly pick through it all, while having a clearer and cleaner rest of the apartment ! I am trying to build a little good habit here and there. It's not arbitrary to want my place to be neater. It keeps cooler - I have stacks of books and magsines and other stuff, cutting off some circulation of the air. It makes me feel more grounded to have a really pleasant environment. It's what I would prefer...cozy, well kept, pleasant. Not perfect, not House & Garden level of decor, but something that reflects who I am !! I am working on it. I want to organise some , clear some because I know going to school and balancing school and a job would be easier if my life wasn't in such a state of disarray !

2004-07-16T23:46:00.000-07:00

Spanish Section...
The first 4-5 pages of chapter 7 cover :
Qué hay en tu guardarropa?

otra palabras utiles : par examplo...
la talla=size
el precio= price
barrato(a)/caro(a)=inexpensive/expensive

Los Colores :
Blanco/a=white
Gris=grey
Negro=black
Marron=brown
Verde=green
Azul=blue
Rojo/a =red
Morado=purple
Rosado/a= pink
Amarillo=yellow
Anaranjado/a=orange

Anaranjado is easier on the eyes than amarillo !!
Mi colore favorita es morado !!

2004-07-12T23:10:00.000-07:00

I missed another class because I didn't feel well. Nothing serious, but it would've distracted me from learning.
I am reviewing the first few pages of the 6th chapter...Capitulo Seis.

En La Ciudad= In The City
Vocabulario = some words listed :
el centro comercial = El centro comercial en mi ciudad está Santa Rosa Plaza.
la tienda = La tienda me gusta mucho está Copperfeilds.
el teatro = Mi favorita teatro está Rialto.
El cafe = El cafe mejor en Santa Rosa está Aromas'.

Talking about actions in the past : El pretérito
La formacion de verbos regulares en el pretérito
Cerrar= cerré , cerrasté, cerró, cerramos,cerraron
Volver=volvi,volviste,volvió,volvimos,volvieron
abrir=abri,abriste,abríó,abrimos,abrieron

Verbos con cambios ortogràficos en el pretérito
verbos irregulars
Cuando ?

Cuando? vocabulario :
En El Pasado
anoche= last night
ayer=yesterday
anteayer= the day before yesterday
la semana pasada=last week
el fin de semana pasado= last weekend
el viernes..pasado= last Friday
el mes/año pasado = last month, year

I know I need some catching up this week ! Weds/Thurs will be big lab catch up days, 1 hour in regular lab, 1 hour watching Destinos.
I've been watching some Spanish films, and TV DVDs etc in Spanish. I think that's helpful.
My energy is very low right now, and if I can get through the next 2 days, I think I can make it , at least til the next energy low point...

2004-07-10T19:04:00.000-07:00

Write about a postcard ( from the Writer's Book of Days )

Well, I write letters and postcards all the time and don't send them. I buy cards and don't send them. I have fantastic ideas of sending, and then getting something back from that person. I have great images of that person going..wow..what a neat card or image or saying...it cheered me up, or made me think. But I end up not doing it. It sits there, on the back burner with all the other intentions. I am sure of the spirit has gone towards me , and maybe the other person, even at just a low level maybe lifting me up or maybe even effecting the other person. I'd like to send more cards, really send them. I have short letters from my parents that don't say much of anything, but I still keep them. It's as if part of them stayed somehow on the page. I would like at least one or two people to have a steady flow of contact via cards from me that way. After I am gone, maybe a few will remain and part of me stay with that person...

2004-07-07T23:04:00.000-07:00

I'm very tired. I need to get to sleep earlier, however last night I tried and woke up after 3 hours...to stay awake for 3 hours and then get 3 hours of sleep. Which does relate to my class and college. I think by the time this short class is done, I'll have figured out how to wake up at 6am, and the whole studying, and keeping awake, and not being so tired thing.
I have an exam tomorrow. I haven't studied as I should have-- I took a long nap this afternoon, and then had to rush off to do something connected to the the re-entry program at my college. It helped me in thinking about priorities and certain programs there on campus that can help me.
Movie log : Spanish movies : All About My Mother...excellent.
Word from the movie : Quirofino = operating room
Spanish usage note : they used beber for drink, and my class is sort of emphasizing tomar.

I might relegate the writing exercises for Thursday through Sunday only...it just seems as if I don't have the energy for that and studying Spanish right now during the other days. I have to make up some lab hours and even though I did better than I hoped, again, on my test...I am sure I will get around a 70 this time around. But we covered so many things this week in only 2 days !!

During the break between summer and fall, I'd like to maybe get a job
( 20-24 hours a week)...clear and clean up my apartment so as I can smoothly go to school and handle a job as well...

I have to at least finish the workbook and practice questions tonight... I think I need an immersion extreme study day before next week, and to think in only 3 weeks I am going to have a final...

2004-07-05T23:34:00.000-07:00

I've looked up some linkage...
I'd like to follow up my Spanish language studies with some sites of cultural and political interest...
Here are a few :
LuzPaz... she doesn't seem to be updating for quite a while, but perhaps that will change !

LatinoPundit...another interesting blog, and he has lots of links to other sources information about Latino culture.

Madre is a political site.
La Jornada is a newspaper site.

Study Spanish Links is a helpful list of Spanish grammar, word etc. sites for the student of Spanish.

================================================
As I am returning to college, I feel I need to have some definate goals. I can explore intellectual horizons on my own, and have, for years and years. However, I want both a possible career degree and some updated working skills for just " plain office work". The office skills may compliment my career objective, and if I don't seem to have the time ( I am looking for a career degree that all in all I am able to complete by or around 2008 or sooner. This includes getting some office skills, some background for a master's degree, including taking about 2-3 semesters or so at undergraduate , lower division level; " catch up" upper division classes that can work into a direct course or pathway to an MA.
The MA that most appeals to me is in Cultural Resource Management. I hope to volunteer at a local museum, in order to make sure this is something I really want to pursue. I am going to take an anthro class this coming semester. If it's something I get a " B" in, and have a decent aptitude towards, this combined with an ongoing interest in the museum volunteer work will inform my decision whether or not to pursue this path. It may involve up to 4 years of college study and I hope to start seriously pursuing this Spring 2005. I am also exploring the history and art history " branch" of CRM. I am not suited to a technical or scientific track, but believe I do have aptitude towards a cultural research / management position.
I have found quite a few sites on the net to peruse and ponder over...especially :
Cultural Resource Mgt. Magazine
Sonoma State University's Anthropolgy Center... this might be where I end up doing my MA. I hope it is, since then I won't have to move for about 4 years !!
Archnet this looks like it has about everything that will lead to everything else.
I am just starting to explore all this. I am excited to finally find some direction that may just bring me down the road to a point where I wake up and think about going to work as more than just a way to fill another day...

2004-07-05T22:10:00.000-07:00

This is my Spanish class entry for the day. We're on Chapter 5, and I am previewing it before we cover it...in 2 1/2 days, considering the holiday and all...
Qué quieres hacer hoy?=What do you want to do today?
Qué prefiere usted?=Which do you prefer to do...?what do you prefer / like to do ?
Vas a venir? = I think that means would you like to come ??
La a personal = Indicating the person who is the object of your attention
A quién amas? = Whom do you love ?
A quién buscas?= Whom are you looking for ?
Verbos con la forma de yo irregular = verbs w/ an irregular yo form
Tener ganas de..; tener que ...y más... =
Tengo ganas...I feel like ...
Está usted enfermo/enferma? Are you sick ? Talking about being ill etc.
El tiempo y las estaciones = the weather and seasons
El presente progresivo = Emphasizing that an action is in progress
Hacer para expresar tiempo = Indicating that an action has been going on for a period of time ...

This is all in one chapter !!!
There's vocabulary,phrases, grammar...well, buene suerte to me !!

2004-07-05T15:17:00.000-07:00

Mutteringsmalltalk is my other blog. I hope you come on over and visit it sometime, it's more general than this blog.

2004-07-05T14:37:00.000-07:00

It's been a while since I came here. I'll try to be a little more daily in my entries.
7/5 in theWriter's Book of Days says to write about a time I cried.
I cried a lot when I was a kid. I was made fun of. I didn't know much more than what my parents told me to do to defend myself...other than
" ignore" ...so instead of getting angry, I turned it onto myself. I cried. I didn't defend or offend or resist, I went somewhere and cried. I wish I had been advised to get a little backbone, to say something back once in a while, to have a few different ways to defend, deflect, resist, reject in my mind the kid's cruel taunts. I don't have children, but if I did, that's what I would attempt to do, to give the kid as many tricks in his or her " what if they make fun of me " bag as I was given " what if I am bored" or " 1001 activities do to while on vacation" etc. bag. My parents raised me well in so many areas, but when I hear about a time I cried, I remember all those kids at school making fun of me.

2004-07-01T18:23:00.000-07:00

I am mixing it up on this blog, part spanish progress = I completed my 3rd week in class and feel like I might not only pass, but get a " C "...

and I am going to -- just for fun, without any forethought or seriousness-- do some writing exercises. I have no idea if my writing is ever going to go anywhere. But I actually want to just meander and write something...The Possiblities are endless, July 1 exercise, Judy Reeves Writer's Book of Days...
" The Possiblities Are Endless"
I am exploring the whole idea of going back to college. I am taking the Spanish class and continuing with Spanish, and most likely, 2-3 Business Office Technology oriented classes and either anthropology or museology, maybe a woman's art history class. I am exploring working in museums and want to volunteer to work in the local museum, to get a taste of museum work.
I want to get some office technology classes under my belt-- some office oreinted computer skills and such. This will open myself to being able to look for a job and advise the person I have real life up to date 21st skills. I don't have the aptitude for in depth computer work, but I know I need to learn some more basics.
The office skills will come in handy , I am sure , in a museum setting. I could go adminstrative, or curatorship, or help on the business end. There are endless possiblities, but I want to find out what I really want to do within the next year, and keep working towards the various possiblities while I progress and decide.

2004-06-20T00:24:00.000-07:00

BBC Spanish
This above site I found to be very basic, but have a good teaching platform and I'll try it for a while to help me review and repeat the basics.
Spanish Language UK
I liked the links section, which might take me elsewhere in the long run.
quia
This site has games and little quizzes, which might help me study for tests and find out how much I do know... and don't !
Study Spanish They have some basic information and exercises etc. I also got the information about changing my keyboard there.

Tomorrow I plan on doing a lot of studying for my test, so I might not be on the 'net at all.
I picked up a few interesting words :

el fontanero = plumber
el correo electrónico = e mail
azarar=embarass, confuse

There's a phrase I liked ... !Asi és la vida ! That's life !

I haven't mastered the new keyboard tricks yet...but asi és la vida !

2004-06-19T22:17:00.000-07:00

This will for the time being, be a weblog of my progress in Spanish.
I am taking a pretty intensive course, a semester's worth in 6 weeks, and decided to do some online study time !
I'm going to find three links to Spanish lessons, and I'm going to try out the keyboard function in Español ...which, as the tilde above my n works seems to be doing well !!
I am also going to record my mini-DVD fest here, as I'll be watching "peliculas en Español" for the next 6 weeks. I think I'll be able to catch around 12 or "doce" "peliculas" ...
It might be slightly disorganised the first few entries, but I'll be doing exercises, and vocabulary and such.
I am going to try to do this everyday.

2004-06-07T14:07:00.000-07:00

Hunger
first things first
last things later
hunger and food, now
hunger and heart, sometime soon maybe
hunger and knowledge, yes that
yes those
yes over there

hunger led me
hunger led me to
hunger led me to first
hunger led me to first the chicken then the egg then
gotta crack the egg for the omelette

you are what i am hungry for
you are what
you are
you

just aren't going to be the right meal for the right occasion in the right location
you
you are not
you're not what I am hungry for
I am hungry for what you are not
hunger
hunger led
hunger led me
here
towards you
made me
feel like
it might be the right occasion to pick the wrong location

hunger.

2004-06-03T12:04:00.000-07:00

It's an old feeling morning
like bent over and sunny and been done already

if you could just wrap warmth up and be still
if i could just stop it all

it's going to be past noon
and walking seems like a good idea

if i can get out of the house
and see where the feet might lead me.

2004-06-02T14:03:00.000-07:00

If a poems fails
can we hear it outside the
forest
of words, of sentences, of lines, of hands reaching for pen and keyboard
Can we touch a poem
can we caress
can we
can
if able, if prehaps, if only
maybe this vagueness is just something
just something if only in my eyes,
maybe this sentence won't go farther
can we
can we progress
can we progress from here to caress, to touching
can we see this seed fall outside to a desert floor, delicate in it's ecosystem
outside, outside, bright sun
lines, fingers tracing pen, tracing your heart,
touches
touches nothing
touches nothing hearing
just something
just
can we progress and hear the hands inside the poem?

2004-05-22T00:51:00.000-07:00

something a little different slouching its way towards 15 minutes of fame, which will get used up around June 1st I'd say, and then will shrinkwrap its way to dvd without playing the theatres...Andy Kaufman Official Blog...

2004-05-17T00:21:00.000-07:00

She slumps forward.
He straightens his tie.
He is satisfied all is done that can be done.
She looks around and sees the dust, blood, flames.
He goes and makes an espresso. He once got a barista to spend an hour with him to teach him the perfect way to make the espresso. He remembers the strand of scarlet hair coming loose from her braid...
She picks herself up, and then her children, and goes to look for her family, her mouth dry and her skin coated with dust...
He sips the espresso.
She sees her uncle. Alive.
It's just bitter enough to remind him of what else needs to be done.

2004-05-16T02:08:00.000-07:00

He saw the needs.
she was walking along
the skies were above them both
he made sure they went
she stood
the sun shone on them
he sat at his desk
she crumpled alone.

2004-05-09T23:14:00.000-07:00

I bought some books today. I am going to develop, thanks to one of these books, a new policy when going into a bookstore: Instead, I'm going to walk, or write in a journal, or sketch, buy a cookie...anything good or pleasurable or interesting for 15 minutes.
I did buy books that pertained to my writer's blockage...
poemcrazy by Susan Goldsmith Wooldridge
Gotham Writers Worskop Wirting Fiction
Full of exercises...full of advice. Right now, I must have 15 books or more about advice etc...so it's a bit obsessive to get anything more !!
I also purchased Brain Lock, by Jeffrey M. Schwartz. It's about OCD, which I pretty much obviously have, if you could see how many unread books or half finished books I have...if you could see how incredibly messy my apartment is, and some other habits I won't mention here... yep, I need to take his program to heart.
I don't think it's bad to collect books, mind you. It's just that my habit has gotten a little bit out of hand, both money and space wise, so it needs to ...be dealt with.

I plan on showing up here and doing some basic exercises, and concentrate on these exercises for a while ... maybe for another month or so, before I attempt to complete anything. They say showing up is part of success, and I keep going back to that adage, so I am going to show up here.

2004-05-08T02:17:00.000-07:00

I am going to show up here even if all I write about is how I don't trust my own writing.
or not.
I am going to attempt to pick myself up and go for it, once again.
I might not write much or do any exercise, or just link to some site with neat stuff I enjoyed ...

Zenporn ( NSFW )
This is an interesting site. I would like to explore eroticism with a little more...literary umph than I have before. I probably won't go wild with the erotic content in this exercise journal, in this whiney complaining about my lack of writing energy journal, but this is a site I noticed, and bookmarked.

As I am extremely stuck and blocked and frozen and dead in the writing water, I am giving myself a challenge not ---not--- to give up, even if it's just write about complaining about how I can't write... and I am also going to finish the following books in May :

Joanne Harris' The Five Quarters of the Orange ( bookgroup book )
Stephen Carter's The Emperor of Ocean Park

Around May 15 or so, I'll get around to seeing what else I can finish. I guess this is becoming my reading journal as well, so I hope to not buy any new books until I finish 10 ones I already have lying around. I think to push on through my 3-4th or 70% of the book finished syndrome is linked somehow to well...not finishing cleaning/clearing my apartment, no following up on a lot of stuff once started, that I sort of abandon after finishing about 35% or 70% of it.

2004-05-07T00:17:00.000-07:00

10 reasons I am not writing ...
1. I feel so blocked I feel frozen.
2. I am verrry down on myself, especially my creativity.
3. I look at words I write and say... how stupid.
4. I just cannot do it.
5. I probably have pursued it for too long without any result. Too late for anything to come of it now.
6. Might as well give up.
7. Who would read and enjoy any of the stuff I write anyway?
8. There's stuff I need to avoid doing, and writing is one, so might as well not do it.
9. I just don't feel like it ...in fact, I feel like destroying every word I have ever written.
10. Why keep trying ?

2004-05-05T23:31:00.000-07:00

Wow. I have really dropped the ball when it comes to this writing thing.
I feel not just blocked, but dead, dead... I feel as if every word that comes out of my head onto the page through my fingers just isn't inspired or talented or...
Sooo. I cannot say anything about doing anything about it tonight. I need to write in order to rebirth my writer, but feel like what little I've written as of the last few months is flat, uninspired, dead, not here, not there- except for maybe a couple of bright spots- and I am depressed and feel alone about the whole thing.
So maybe sometime in the next few days, I'll pick myself up off the floor of the pityme cafe, and write some more utter dregs.
It's just that I honestly wanted to write a script, or a novel...and I cannot honestly say right now that I feel capable of either. It's been soooo long, prehaps I ought to give it up and pursue some other interest. When should one give up ?

2004-04-22T00:50:00.000-07:00

My RSI is acting up and I think I need a rest from typing.

Poetry Month Almanac...
That's an interesting site.

I'll have to do around 4 exercises Thursday and Friday each to make up for my lackadaisical attitude tonight !!

2004-04-20T22:23:00.000-07:00

Short entry ...
I bought just one book today. I overthought, very long and hard, almost bought a book on women artists, and a book on Georgia O'Keefe. Instead, I just bought Humans By Robert Sawyer. I just thought...would I really miss not buying this book??
Cannot. resist. a . good neandrathal. alternative. world. story !!!

I'll come back wednesday and do some poetry, prose, etc.

2004-04-20T01:44:00.000-07:00

I had a strange dream Sunday...I dreamt I was being herded into a large h.s. gym, which had a matte painting ( but a rather bad one...) of a tropical sunny beach scene on one of it's large walls. There were maybe a thousand people there. I was sitting near the front row. I saw a man talking about the inevitablility of a nuclear war and the blast etc. They were handing out suicide pills to assauge the pain. We would die before any blast could kill us, or we would feel any pain if we weren't directly under the blast.etc.
The suicide pills were -- I think--pink and oddly shaped. I was handed a small cup with three. I pulled away in distaste, in not wanting to have anything to do with the suicide pills. But somehow I changed my mind- via other people's starting to take them, and talking to me about it... and I took them.
The dream kinda fades after that.
What's really striking is the emotional feeling. It's partially distaste...for the pills & suicide...partially fear from nuclear doom & war, impending and inevitable unavoidable death...partially despair, and being out of control... but it's such a strong emotional state I can practically recreate the whole feeling, the dream over again- at least it's more memorable and salient parts. There's a feeling of loss...of surrender. But this masala of feelings isn't a good one, it's not positive. The odd thing is, I have felt it elsewhere, maybe twice in my life, but don't remember where. The real life incident/event where it was felt I cannot seem to call up. It's similar but not the same as my feeling of fearful concern when my mother lay dying, and when I was at the hospital after my father died. It's not quite those feelings. I feel somehow it's very important to try and find out if I ever felt that.

2004-04-17T23:41:00.000-07:00

Character backstory of an altar ego ( Bonni Goldberg's book )
someone opposite for you, very different in various specifics, in details...
Born : 1969, Summer of Love...9/1/69
Parents : Father was a bank manager...mother a stay at home mom
Siblings : 3 ...2 older, one younger.
Raised : San Diego 69-74 ; San Francisco 75-81 ; Santa Barbara 81-87
Attended : SF Inst of Art, BFA

Successful painter of abstracts...married twice...m'd 1992 div 1994 ; m'd 2001 ; has one child b. 2003.
Her artwork progressed from bright colorful peices, to darker, more intense peices.
She is tall, slender without effort although she does yoga and works out regularly, she is very gregarious and doesn't mind schmoozing. Her hair has been a dozen colors from 1988-2000, but she's finally decided to go natural-- a pale wheat blond, very long, usually in a braid. Her skin is a golden brown, her eyes a very dark grey-green, and she has very high cheekbones, a scuplted chin. She gets mistaken for Gwynneth Paltrow.
She reads a lot of books, very fast, very focused. She does like a good bodice ripper once in a while, and always completes her book before buying or starting another.
Her home is a mix of comfortable and immaculate, and never cluttered, disorderly, always has a good enough look to have someone over " at the drop of a hat". She is very spontaneous, however she knows how to watch her dollars, is fairly good at investments.
Her name is Ava Blaine-Vinson.

There...my alter ego...so to speak..

2004-04-17T03:16:00.000-07:00

From Bonnie Goldberg's book..challenge your syntax,grammar...use words differently, a bit askew...

Sucking from the orange sunlips
The man disengaged his ornery self
self, who went away sometime over that clock
that clock when it meets the road
the road where it lost its meaner desires
started sleeping,
fell off.

distant.

2004-04-15T03:49:00.000-07:00

I am going to return Carolyn See's book...all those rules aren't for me, I need someone who gives some guidelines and exercises for writing, not someone who makes more rules than I can possibly follow gracefully.

I've not been here for 2 days. It's very early in the morning, so my thought process might not be conducive to more than one short exercise. But I'll attempt to do another 2-3 during Thursday day.

I'm twisting a few different exercises and...what clutters up my life ?

I live in clutter. I own about 6 different kinds of lotions...I have piles of books everywhere, that's about 15 % of my clutter. If I put my books, even if I stacked them horizonally not vertically...in my cases, then it would clear a good portion of my cluttery look. If I stacked up and cleared out my DVD's and CD's, another 10 % of the clutter would disappear.
CD's are a better investment than most books. CD's you listen to at least 30 times , well, there ya go, they've paid for themselves. I have listened to a chosen few about 200 times, even more !!! Books are at most read --by me, anyway---a dozen times. and that, again is maybe a dozen books I have.
So, i take care of storing my CD's, DVD's, and books, and my place would seem cleaner, clearer and it would take about 2 hours !! This would be a positive action towards making everything look a little better...
Another cluttery thing is dishes, and stuff, like that. I only keep them on my desk that I use for my table, and all over the kitchen. Clear and clean that, and poof, another 10% cluttery stuff gone !!
I could actually address those problems in about 4 hours, and come out of those hours with a 20% clearer/cleaner looking livingroom and kitchen !!

2004-04-12T23:00:00.000-07:00

I just got some new books on writing...I don't know if I can follow all the advice in this book..Carolyn See's Making a Literary Life...but taking prehaps some of her advice to heart, and such, might just help...
She has one little exercise...start where you are..what genre am I ??
I'd say I was a drama with a poetic edge.

She also says to write 1000 words a day. That's three and half pages, usually, of paragraphs, not just lists or sparsely written pages. She mentions writing a charming note to a writer, agent, publisher etc. everyday. I am sorry, I am certainly willing to make that and turn that around and twist her meaning to my own nefarious ends and to reach out to 5 different people every week, and write them an email, send them a card and make that part of my goal. I do not reach out to the people I know enough, and everybody likes recieving a nice message or email or card.
I might change my mind after I read her rationale.
But the 1000 words will include these exercises. Also, my other blogs. At least til May 5, when I am going to maybe delve into another phase of my writing, or commit to another month of exercises.

Bonni Goldberg's book...she has an exercise that asks you to make a list of things you miss...

I miss...
my parents.
having a larger place.
some old freinds.
dancing.
sex. with another person.
wandering around italy.
feeling better about me.
some of my youth.
having someone around.
having a clearer apartment.

2004-04-12T14:53:00.000-07:00

The important things are that I am doing this for myself...that I am consistant...

Bonni Goldberg's book..experience everything as a flavor...

Right now, I taste in my mouth a need to brush my teeth. My apartment is a goulash of messiness and has a great potential to taste sweeter. It is a closed feeling, closed off, tasting musty and mould and tight. Tight tastes like a lemon, too sour, too tart, too much restrictions and not enough space. Also, dark, my apartment is dark, like a heavy whole wheat bread. It nurtures, nourishes, is cozy, but I need light and colors.
My life is flavored right now like vanilla with a little cinnamon...I need savories. I need curries. I need onions and pesto and texture. My body feels like potatoes today, potatoes that need to turn to something more feminine, like a mango. ( there's a mango in my garden...and she's giving it to me...Bruce Cockburn...)
I think of my father, and I remember chocolate chip cookies, which of course, my mother made masterfully...my dad would always say that he needed to eat one more slightly burnt cookie of mine to see if it was okay or not...so today, my memories of my parents are sweet, caring, and accepting.

2004-04-12T02:40:00.000-07:00

well, I feel like writing some more exercises, got some more energy from somewhere...

write a poem that scares you with your spine as audience...exercise by Sandra McPherson ...
===============================================================

I walk on.
I walk down. I look over there, I keep going.
I look over there, I walk down, I keep going.
I see a bee right next to me, ready to sting.
I see a match near me, wanting to be lit.
I walk past the bee, I do not jump or wave my hands and talk to it...I do not scream, I walk on.
I light the match. I do not set anything afire. I continue to walk down a steep stair.
down, down, steep angle, dark ceiling, using only my hands against the wall as support.
I see an empty hole. I see it goes down and down. I look at it. I stare down into the hole. i see there is a protective fence all around it.
Down at the bottom is a dog.
I am halfway down the steep stairs, with slanted cieling , and I look down the hole at the dog.
I keep walking.
I reach the bottom of the stairs. The dog is still there. Behind a protective fence, barking, growling, and outside, it's dark. Dark and cold, drizzling. I go outside...enveloping me...the cold surrounds and the drizzle turns to rain.

=============================================================

If I want a Poem written about me and for me, I better do it myself

wonderful
little hands fluttering
I feel my pulse sometimes off sometimes on

my makeup
in a bag.
first lips, no sometimes first eyes, then cheeks.
cheeks must not be blotchy. some shadows along the cheekbones.
it makes me look thinner.

my bed. it's got stars and moons and near my bed, a telephone and near that my alarm clock
above my bed at the head of it, O'Keefe painting poster black hollyhock with blue larkspur
big black flower with a fuschia star heart , with blue flowers, clustered, next to it, almost embracing.

2004-04-12T02:08:00.000-07:00

Again, I am tired, but I do want to do these exercises, and show up, do something everyday....
This is from Room To Write by Bonni Goldberg...

Things I fear ...bees, dogs, steep stairs and falling, steep angles and walking down them, fire. I am getting better with everything except fire. Fire scares me so much I won't light a match, I prefer those long butane torch thingies. Dogs seem like most animals..uncontrollable. Lately I have felt a lot better about dogs. Prehaps my need to control situations is less. I think that as I become more receptive, less controling, I seem to be able to face my fears better. I am able to go down steep stairs with less trepidation. However, I saw an open pit for an escalator installation that I couldn't look at. It was right near stairs and so I just had to walk very quickly past this weird gaping hole where an escalator used to be.

These two poems are from exercises from the Behn and Twichell book...

This is a prompt sentence poem from an exercise from Linnea Johnson

Love is to open sky as loathing is to...
closed heart...
once, I ached against a window
for the stars.
black. night. wrapped in a cloak,
I wandered out, almost lost, nearly found.
I would have walked anywhere. I was dizzied by the stars, and the cloak and impulse.
Hungered for the wind, winding road, nowhere. and then I went back inside.

=======================================================
another prompt sentence...

Nothing was the same not that it was so long since they'd seen each other...
they were sitting across a table.
coffee. breakfast. clouded sun.
they looked across the table.
grey hair. dark hair. dyed hair.
they saw themselves across the table.
food. spoon. hands,still.
they'd seen each other for a short time a while ago so it seemed a long time ago since they
had watched each other's face move, the wrinkles were so new, they looked younger than they should have.

2004-04-11T01:20:00.000-07:00

I am very tired, but I sincerely think I need to show up here, and do an excercise...Sunday day I'll be busy, and I don't want to skip and not do at least 30...
I am going to fill in the blanks from a long list of partial sentences...This is from The Practice of Poetry by Robin Behn and Chase Twichell
exercise is by Linnea Johnson...
A spider on an old man's beard is white and twisty...
The oars on the boat rowed as if through nothing
Nothing was the same , now that it was the dark hour
The wino took to coma like peace on Sunday,
The dice rolled out of the cup toward Len like-- bones lost from the grave
A child in pain is like a heart in acid.

Puffy clouds in your glass of wine are floating ,
Your heart is like muscles stretched taut over bone.
The fog plumed through the gunshot holes in the train windows like smoke...

and I am done for the night...not very good in my estimation. It's been one of those days.

2004-04-10T00:26:00.000-07:00

Found Poem

In a biography of Ginsberg, randomly chosen
Found
a card
almost a sienna color
a flourish of bow and arrows, roses and wreath
over words :
" When Love speaks
the voice of all the gods
make heaven drowsy
with the harmony. "
William Shakespeare...
inside text
I love you
signed Gwyn .

There is also a blank notepad page small.
I threw out the torn in half missing children notices.
and information for some local telephone company's rates for 1996.

This receipt was found :
Haggen Barkley Village
( unnamed source : this is in Bellingham, Washington )
this bookowner, the customer of Haggen Barkley Village bought this the day of 2/18/96 at 8:56pm
( this is just a few days after Valentine's day...)
The bookowner ( the person who owned Ginsberg, a biography by Barry Miles ) bought :
Dari Unsalted butter, nancy's plain yogurt , old fashion potato salad, yellow onions, Italian wine salami, jalapenos, planters almonds, cilantro-bunch, and a Sunday NY Times.

at the bottom of the receipt " we use recyled paper"
on the back is someone's phone number.and the abbreviated name, Robt. with Robt.'s number...
also, the names or reference to : Prestige Saul, or Sail...and Sanpler sail or Sampler sail.

===============================================================

2004-04-08T14:05:00.000-07:00

Best Cafe's in Santa Rosa, California
1. Centro Espresso : best coffee, small area out front to drink coffee and have a very light goodie, connected to Sawyers News , so you can buy a magazine and read , and drink a very good latte.
2. Aroma's : in Railroad Square. In an old stone building that used to be Lena's Restaurant, near the old depot used in Hitchcock's Shadow of a Doubt. Best bet, if you like latte like me, double latte. Excellent atmosphere, sometimes verrrry crowded ( holidays= it's right next to an adjunct campus of The New School...and near enough to the local Junior College...if it's raining and a holiday...it's gonna be filled with students.) sometimes just moderately busy. You can stay there all day. Really. They have good salads, also. If you want to get a real feel for what Sonoma County is like, go there and you'll see Sonoma County in all its permutations, from business guy to tatooed pierced gal to people having meetings to studious laptop persons. The back tea room is usually a bit more quiet than the front.
3. Wolf Coffee Co. : This also is a real cupful of Sonoma County... great coffee !! Downtown Santa Rosa's cafe is right on Courthouse Square. It's a local chain, there's probably around 10 of them, I think they might have one in Napa, even. Good place to sit , read, have a bagel...
4. Sonoma Coffee Co : Yummy. Been there for years and years and years. Photos of locals on the walls... also, you can sit there all day, and sometimes not even order anything ! The best bet for the not ordering anything = go there regularly off and on for quite a long time...but sit and nurse one cuppa and do your homework or read all day, it's okay.
5. Peet's on 4th st. Yeah, it's a big chain, but they're popular and have these wonderful little almond cake thingies. I like them.

2004-04-08T13:38:00.000-07:00

I am showing up again. I'd like to make this my writing exercise blog, with poetry and see if I like a plainer blog than the switches colors blog...
It's not gonna be just about coffee, but I'll try to come here for a full 30 days of writing exercises. Then take stock...do I want a blog like this, or my fancier one ??? or both???
========================================================
The Practice of Poetry edited by Robin Behn & Chase Twichell
This is one of the books I'll be using for my exercises.
========================================================
Take ten lines of famous poetry and change them, just a little...summary of exercise by William Matthews...

well...this is a little more than 10 , it's a whole poem by one person...this is from Wild Nights by Emily Dickenson...

Wild nights- Sweeter lights
If I was with you
Sweetest nights should be
our everyday

Fullness-the directions-
To a heart inside-
Done with the Compass-
gone, without a chart

Rowing towards Eden-
approaching the shore
might I but reach , tonight,
you.

=================================================

2004-03-04T03:33:00.000-08:00

I haven't stopped by for over a week ! I do want to try and make this a consistant, 3-4 days a week dealio on coffee, and soooo here I am showing up.
I haven't gotten my cafe glace' or whatever it's called yet. Haven't gone out and sampled the coffees at the various cafes. Haven't been drinking coffee much for about a week or so, thus the absence of presence here.
Coffee oriented characters on TV :
1. The brother's Frazier.
2. Freind's Cast.
3. Daniel on Stargate:SGC

Cities I associate with Coffee :
1. Seattle
2. San Francisco
3. New Orleans
4. Portland
5. Paris
6. Vienna

2004-02-24T01:22:00.000-08:00

Our town has gotten a new Peets...across from Starbucks. It is down the street from 3 other cafes.
Peets was crowded. Full. to the brim ! People came coming in, meeting freinds, and staying probably on the average 40 minutes. One guy kinda was camped out with his laptop, but who knows, it might have been the manager- it was Sunday and their first day. It did help that the weather was decent.

I have a craving for a cafe semifreddo or whatever it's called...it's espresso with gelato, and it's served at a small Italian cafe nearby, so that's probably going to be a visit very soon.

3 more things about coffee and me...
1. I sometimes do like syrups , flavors in my espresso/coffee. Probably about 10% of the time. I go through phases. Mostly about 1/2 the amount they usually put in, and usually something very simple, like hazelnut or vanilla or almond.
2. If I don't make my coffee correct, if it doesn't taste right to me, I'll dump it out. I'll start again.
3. I love the smell of coffee. Even bad coffee can have a decent to good smell.

2004-02-19T01:54:00.000-08:00

I have just bought 3 books :
the Coffee Book by Gregory Dicum and Nina Luttinger
Coffee Wisdom , 7 Finely Ground Principles for Living a Full Bodied Life by Theresa Cheung
Too Much Coffee Man's Guide for the Perplexed Shannon Wheeler

First of Ms. Cheung's 7 principles of Coffee Wisdom :
1. Reheating causes bitterness.
Your past is the reason, not the excuse.

3 things about coffee and me...
1. If I don't eat right, my blood sugar goes wonky after coffee. I find vitamin c, and protien to be really important with this.
2. Coffee is sometimes an appetite supressent for me. Sometimes, it just seems I don't want to eat after coffee.
3. I drink coffee for the buzz and flavor. I see no reason to waste my tastebuds on mediocre or poor coffee, although sometimes I just cannot help it.

2004-02-16T20:13:00.000-08:00

I had an excellent cappucino at another cafe in the Railroad Square part of Santa Rosa ( the Santa Rosa in California, that is...) A'romas ...delicious. Also added link to Coffeeresearch and will be adding more , later...

Coffee in the movies...
One of my favorite scenes is in Blue with Juliette Binoche, when she is just looking at the sugar soaking up the coffee...

2004-02-16T13:33:00.000-08:00

I bought 2 1/2 lbs bags of coffee from this company :Wolf Coffee Company ...
Their premium blend...and Guatamala. I just had some Premium, and it's very good, slightly acidic tasting to me, with a little nutty background. Kinda earthy, too.
I will probably get a couple of other blends from another local cafe when I am half done with these two.

Some more items about me and coffee :
1. Currently reading Uncommon Grounds ; The History of Coffee and How it Transformed Our World ...thoroughly enjoying it ! It's written by Mark Pendergrast.
2. I think life is much too short for bad coffee, and I only tolerate it when I want to. Which is rarely.

2004-02-12T14:54:00.000-08:00

Added a link to All About Coffee...
I didn't link back yet...I want to see how this blog goes for a while before I put it " out there "...there's a blog listed that has only one entry, so I want to make sure this is the " real thing", which means I visit here at least 3 times a week, and it lasts longer than 90 days.

I am gonna try to get 2-3 1/4 lbs of coffee from a few different places and try them out as afternoon cups. Hopefully in the next few days, I'll have the names and initial reaction to these coffees. I am gonna finish of my Sumatran for my morning brew, however.

Some more items about me and coffee :
1. I love drinking coffee at movies. My local megaplex has a cafe attached, and their coffee is alright about 40% of the time, pretty good about 25 % of the time and the rest very much so-so. I also like eating ice cream with the coffee. yumm. Pistachio and mint chocolate chip.
2. I fine iced coffee and lattes delicious , however, I don't like them when the temp. is over 92 or so, I prefer iced chai. It probably won't be 92 degrees until sometime in June, but iced coffee weather starts at around 75 for me...somewhere around spring.
3. The espresso that one of my freinds in college turned me onto was Cafe Bustelo ( tm ) which had a red can I think, with a guy drinking a cup of espresso saying something about " con mucho gusto". This was a long time ago. But I still remember their little kitchen, wih the window overlooking LA from their tiny cottage in Silver Lake.
4. I like real milk in my coffee, and I drink lattes when I am out. Occasionally I drink it black= especially when I have no milk in the house, like right now= and also occasionally I drink espresso black , or caramel macchiato-- the real thing, espresso with a dollop or two of foam--and caramel...

2004-02-12T02:13:00.000-08:00

A few items about me and coffee...
1. First memory about coffee : I didn't like it, but I loved coffee ice cream. This was until I got into the first year of college, wherein I discovered a coffeehouse and 2 freinds who adored coffee.
2. My coffee I have currently in my house : Trader Joe's Dark Sumatra
3. I use a simple Melitta ( tm ) filter ...

I have another blog...mutteringsmalltalk
where I explore movies, personal stuff, political issues, other information. I rate movies by cups of coffee and what sort of coffee it might be. For instance :
1 cup= worth maybe 25% of the price of the movie and really not worth seeing...such as Speed 2...stale, bitter, dull, metallic taste...
2 cups = worth about 50% of the price of the movie ticket...you don't have to see this, wait to rent it and only if it's your favorite director or actor or subject...such as Along Came Polly
3 cups=pretty damn good movie. Rent it if you want but try to see it in the theatre...such as Tears of the Sun ...a rich brew, smoky and earthy.
4 cups = almost a classic, see this as soon as possible willya ? Such as ...House of Sand and Fog
5 cups = classic, but maybe it's my own personal taste so... latest would be Lost in Translation

So feel free and visit my other blog sometime.